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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some sports are extremely dangerous but many people still like them very much. Why do people take part in dangerous sports? Give some suggestions on how to deal with these dangers.

#sports #people #part #suggestions #dangers
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In recent years we have seen a considerable rise in dangerous or extreme sports.
This
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 essay shall discuss some of the main reasons why people engage in
such
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 types of games and suggest ways in which some risks involved in
such
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 sports can be reduced. The main reason why people go for dangerous games is that they get the thrill out of them. They like taking risks. They like to challenge their abilities and potential. They feel a sense of satisfaction when they come face to face with fears
while
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 bungee jumping, rock climbing and so on.
In addition
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, going through a dangerous experience gives them the courage and confidence to face the hurdles of their daily life. Another reason for pursuing
such
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 physical activities is that there is a lot of fame and money involved in them. They get attention by doing stunts on motorcycles and jumping from tall buildings. They make headlines in newspapers and TV News Channels. They feel great when their name comes in the Guinness Book of World Records. Once they get famous they get a lot of money
also
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.
For instance
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, many businesses hire them to endorse their products. They
also
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 get jobs on the basis of
such
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 skills. Many steps can be taken to reduce the risks are that involved.
Firstly
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, these games should be done under strict supervision. All safety precautions should be taken.
Such
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 types of physical activities should be performed after sufficient training and under the supervision of adults. To put it in a nutshell, I pen down saying that, people do
such
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 sports for fun, for money and for fame.
However
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,
such
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 athletics should be performed after sufficient training from licensed companies and under some supervision.
Submitted by simran31788 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure all main points support the topic and avoid going off topic.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure ideas are well organized and linked throughout the essay for better coherence and cohesion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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