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Writing Samples
Band 6

Many people think modern communication technology is having some negative effects on social relationships. Do you agree or disagree?

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Owing to the technological breakthrough,
people
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 are inclined to use social media
such
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 as Facebook. It is widely argued that newer
technology
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 may inflict the bonds of close relations negatively. I completely agree with the given phenomenon, since newer technological
communication
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 may weaken genuine human connections and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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brings
Correct subject-verb agreement
bring
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 about social isolation and family issues.
Firstly
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,
due to
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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cutting edge
Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
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communication
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technology
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,
people
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 tend to meet their friends and relations through social media rather than visiting them physically.
This
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 will mitigate face-to-face interactions and
people
Use synonyms
 can hide their true face from the public.
As a result
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, genuine relationships may be broken.
For instance
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, a recent study which was done by the
ministry
Capitalize word
Ministry
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 of
social affairs
Correct your spelling
Social Affairs
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 in Sri Lanka, reveals that 97% of
people
Use synonyms
 are reluctant to visit their kith and kin.
Therefore
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,
it is clear that
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 digital
communication
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 devices have many drawbacks.
Secondly
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, modernized
communication
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 ushers social loneliness and alleviates familial bonds. To be more precise, a person who is addicted to social media
such
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 as Facebook, cannot maintain a good relationship with his or her family.
This
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 tendency leads to many social concerns.
For instance
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, approximately 97% of individuals who spend more time with digital devices, tend to report divorce cases,
according to
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a
Remove the article
apply
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recent research which was done by the authorities of
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
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.
Hence
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,
by engaging
Verb problem
spending
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 more time with modern
communication
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technology
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 may
results
Wrong verb form
result
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 in personal lives
negatively
Rephrase
apply
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. In conclusion, there is a common belief that
cutting edge
Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
show examples
communication
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 may weaken individuals’ relationships
as well as
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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
brings
Correct subject-verb agreement
bring
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 about negative ramifications. I totally agree with the given view, because newer
technology
Use synonyms
 results in many social burdens. It is recommended that the sovereign government should impose public awareness programs and impose stringent laws on social platforms to protect society as well.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • face-to-face interactions
  • messaging apps
  • social media
  • non-verbal cues
  • family bonds
  • dependency
  • digital communication
  • superficial relationships
  • cyberbullying
  • online harassment
  • social isolation
  • virtual connections
  • emotional satisfaction
  • real-life interactions
  • technological intrusion
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