Nowadays the population of young people is more than old people in the countries and it benefit us. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Recently, the total number of people in the world is still increasing significantly, especially youngsters.

This

phenomenon leads to youngsters being plentier than the old person in the countries and some say that it benefits us. I strongly agree with the statement and I reckon that it is incredibly true

due to

the effects it brings,

such

as a new and fresh mindset from them and the feeling of security that our future is guaranteed by knowing that there will be many pupils who are able to replace the old ones.

First,

our children have a very different mindset because of the

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

and environment where they grow up,

this

leads to a more innovative and adapted behaviour to create more. They are capable of adapting to the technology which old ones find

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

hard to do.

For example

, children are adapted to smartphones, Artificial Intelligence, and smart TVs.

This

phenomenon causes them to comprehend

these technology

Change the determiner

this technology

these technologies

show examples

. In short, the different

way

Fix the agreement mistake

ways

show examples

of thinking possessed by the new generation are enabling them to innovate and adapt to

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

new

condition

Fix the agreement mistake

conditions

show examples

Moreover

, lots of young pupils generate the feeling of safety that the older generation is going to be replaced by the newer and better one. They are able to replace any job

that is

unoccupied better, faster, and more innovative.

For instance

, in Japan, they are worried that they can not make sure that their civilization is able to endure

due to

the lack of new successors. In short, it is important that our inheritors exist to continue what their predecessors have built and done. In conclusion, I strongly agree that the population of our successor being far more than the predecessor is benefiting us,

due to

being able to evolve our world towards many advancements and being capable of replacing them.

Submitted by twiggseducationbdg on Fri Aug 25 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

302 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays the population of young people is more than old people in the countries and it benefit us. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others,however,say other measures are required.

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school, Do the advantages of this outweight disadvantages.

Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life compeletly separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Most people are not interested in how their food has been produced. They only care about how much it costs. How true is this statement? What influences people when they buy food? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.