Friends and family bring more happiness than money and possessions. How far do you agree with this statement?
It is a common belief that
money
and possessions
do not provide as much happiness
as friends
and family. While
there are some positive sides to this
statement, I am of the opinion that money
and possessions
make everyone happier.
On the one hand, the idea of happiness
is
brought more by Wrong verb form
being
friends
and family is benefical
to some extent. The first and primary reason for Correct your spelling
beneficial
this
is friends
and family can give us meaningful connections and supportive advice from heart
that Add an article
the heart
a heart
money
basically can not .This
is because these actions can comprehend the offspring which leading
to Wrong verb form
leads
the
well-educated children and Correct article usage
apply
develop
their personality portrait. Correct subject-verb agreement
develops
For instance
, children who live in poverty have difficult
Add an article
a difficult
life
, but with the encouragement of people around, especially family or friends
, some of them even become very successful in life
Moreover
, it is obvious that the basis of relationship
has to do with the Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
happiness
and positive energy that arises. For example
, giving a special gift to your friends
or hold
a birthday party for a member of your family can spread joy to them.
In spite of Wrong verb form
holding
above-mentioned
ideas, I Correct article usage
the above-mentioned
believed
that Wrong verb form
believe
money
and possessions
bring more happiness
than people around us. To commence with, the value of money
and possessions
play the
important role Correct article usage
an
to make
our Change preposition
in making
life
more comfortable. They support the
higher education in order to assist us Correct article usage
apply
to have
Change preposition
in having
a
better revenue. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, when we have the
good-quality educational system or a professional teacher, we can be trained better. Correct article usage
a
Moreover
, having money
can help us out when we ill
as we can pay Add a missing verb
are ill
money
for good
healthcare system. Correct article usage
a good
For example
, money
can be useful when there is a serious emergency. As a consequence
, the given opinions will lead to the increase of materialism.
In conclusion, while
i
support the view that Change the capitalization
I
happiness
can be brought by money
or possessions
, I disagree that family anf
Correct your spelling
and
friends
can bring it more. That's because the earnings can make
us a better Verb problem
give
life
.Submitted by simmy6a1 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite