Music play an important role in society, others think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People

Use synonyms

have differing views with regard to the question of how

music

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affects our lives.

While

Linking Words

some argue that

music

Use synonyms

is just a part of entertainment, I believe the advantages of it can go far beyond Admittedly, there is good reason to say that

music

Use synonyms

is an important part.

To begin

Linking Words

with,

music

Use synonyms

helps suffer with health problems.

For instance

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, I had a plan to die a year ago. I got psychosis and thought about suicide many times. It was a terrible time for me and I could not

forget

Correct pronoun usage

itforget

show examples

However

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, at that time,

music

Use synonyms

saved my life. I found out that listening to

music

Use synonyms

was one of the strategies to help me feel better. I did not have any thoughts about disappearing.

Music

Use synonyms

is a method

that is

Linking Words

suitable for many

people

Use synonyms

who are in difficult circumstances There is

also

Linking Words

a compelling reason to argue why

music

Use synonyms

is not just a form of entertainment.

Music

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can

also

Linking Words

contribute to our income.

Producers

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in one of the most popular jobs nowadays. If they can compose a new song with catchy rhythms, they can earn a great deal of money from that song. A good example is that many new

producers

Use synonyms

have uploaded their songs on social media. Many

people

Use synonyms

are in love with them and these songs becoming more and more popular.

Therefore

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producers

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can get money from the views of their songs or from cooperation invitations of other

producers

Use synonyms

In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

there are some arguments about the need for

music

Use synonyms

. I believe

music

Use synonyms

is not only a part of entertaining but

also

Linking Words

a treatment and a work for many

people

Use synonyms

chi

Aug 26, 2023

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural tool
shared identity
cognitive development
creativity
mental health
music therapy
chronic pain
entertainment value
personal escape
cultural background

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