Music play an important role in society, others think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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People

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have differing views with regard to the question of how

music

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affects our lives.

While

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some argue that

music

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is just a part of entertainment, I believe the advantages of it can go far beyond Admittedly, there is good reason to say that

music

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is an important part.

To begin

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with,

music

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helps suffer with health problems.

For instance

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, I had a plan to die a year ago. I got psychosis and thought about suicide many times. It was a terrible time for me and I could not

forget

Correct pronoun usage

itforget

show examples

However

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, at that time,

music

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saved my life. I found out that listening to

music

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was one of the strategies to help me feel better. I did not have any thoughts about disappearing.

Music

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is a method

that is

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suitable for many

people

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who are in difficult circumstances There is

also

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a compelling reason to argue why

music

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is not just a form of entertainment.

Music

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can

also

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contribute to our income.

Producers

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in one of the most popular jobs nowadays. If they can compose a new song with catchy rhythms, they can earn a great deal of money from that song. A good example is that many new

producers

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have uploaded their songs on social media. Many

people

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are in love with them and these songs becoming more and more popular.

Therefore

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producers

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can get money from the views of their songs or from cooperation invitations of other

producers

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In conclusion,

while

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there are some arguments about the need for

music

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. I believe

music

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is not only a part of entertaining but

also

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a treatment and a work for many

people

Use synonyms

chiSat Aug 26 2023

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural tool
shared identity
cognitive development
creativity
mental health
music therapy
chronic pain
entertainment value
personal escape
cultural background

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Music play an important role in society, others think it is simply a form of entertainment for individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Write a letter to your friend to ask him/her to develop a website for your business. In your letter: Give a brief description of the business Mention what you’d like to be there on the website Provide some ideas on use of images on the web site.

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In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

It is important to involve punishment when educating children so that they can distinguish right and wrong. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this notion?