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Band 6

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
There is no denying the fact that
choices
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 available in the past and nowadays,
While
 it is a commonly held belief that in recent years there are more options than in the past. There is
also
 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays there are
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
 of
choices
 to take more than
Change preposition
in previously
show examples
previously
Change the word
previous
show examples
 centuries.
To begin
 with,
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
these days governments and companies offer many jobs or chances to be what you want to be in your future,
also
 before that they gave you a chance to work
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
your-self
Correct your spelling
yourself
show examples
 in
child
Replace the word
childhood
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 and adulthood
also
Correct word choice
and also
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discovred
Correct your spelling
discovered
 your dreams.
In other words
, after
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 graduate from secondary school, they
could planned
Wrong verb form
can plan
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 if they want to study in college or not,
this
 point
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
lot
Add an article
a lot
show examples
Change preposition
of different
show examples
different
Replace the word
difference
show examples
 in
life's
Change noun form
life
show examples
 person
,.
Change the punctuation
,
.
show examples
In
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
 people
are having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 freedom to choose where they want to live.
For example
, if they want to live with their
familes
Correct your spelling
families
 or alone
this
 might depend
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 many situations. Another point to consider, in ancient ages people
work
Wrong verb form
worked
show examples
 in
same
Correct article usage
the same
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 jobs
their
Correct word choice
as their
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 fathers
do
Wrong verb form
did
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, but now it is different, if you have dreams or
desire
Correct subject-verb agreement
desires
show examples
 you
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 wish
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 and do
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. It is
also
 possible to say that, because
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
 poverty in
old
Fix the agreement mistake
the older
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 generation they cannot leave their households if they do will
died
Change the verb form
die
show examples
 because they have farms and animals to take care of
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.
Moreover
, some countries restricted their rules which means a limit of freedom and
choices
.
For instance
,
Saudies
Correct your spelling
Saudi
 women
cannot
Wrong verb form
could not
show examples
 drive cars in past. In conclusion despite people having different views, I believe that the world
change
Change the verb form
changes
show examples
 most time and will give you more and more
choices
 in future which is
gift
Add an article
a gift
show examples
 from god.
Submitted by d76273619 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
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