the graph below gives information about the percentage of the population of four asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040

#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions

The line graph illustrates the proportion of urban residents in

Philippines

Correct article usage

the Philippines

show examples

Malaysia

, Thailand and

Indonesia

between 1970 and 2020,with the expectations from 2030 to 2040.

Overall

, it is clearly shown on the chart that the percentage of population in all four countries is increasing and

Malaysia

has the highest

percent

Replace the word

percentage

show examples

almost all the time.

Malaysia

and

Indonesia

all have a significant

rise

in their proportion of population, respectively from 30 to 85 for

Malaysia

and 13 to 63 for

Indonesia

Malaysia

has always been

the

Change preposition

at the

show examples

top except

1970

Change preposition

in 1970

show examples

and 1990 with a little gap

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

the first.

Indonesia

was the

last

in 1970. But its rate grew quickly and

exceed

Wrong verb form

exceeded

show examples

other

Correct article usage

the other

show examples

two countries in 2000 and 2010.

Philippines

Correct article usage

The Philippines

show examples

was

the

Change preposition

at the

show examples

top at

first,

with

Change the article

show examples

obvious increase from 31 to 50 in 1990 but

then

dropped to 45

Change preposition

show examples

2010.

Finally

, it is expected to

rise

to 55 which is lower than

Indonesia

.Thailand have a slow

rise

from 18 to 30 at first and

then

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

almost no

changeable

Replace the word

change

show examples

until it is predicted to

rise

again by 2020 and the rate still is the

last

one in the end.

Submitted by huangzijun2293 on Mon Aug 28 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words malaysia, indonesia, rise with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.

▼

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

189 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

graph
percentage
population
Asian countries
living in cities
1970
2020
predictions
2030
2040
introduction
overview
trend
body paragraph
compare
predicted percentages
summarize
closing statement

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the graph below gives information about the percentage of the population of four asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040

You have been selected for a training course on computer skills that you cannot attend. WRITE A LETTER TO YOUR EMPLOYER AND SAY Explain how this training course would help you Why won't you be able to attend it Suggest a way to have that training again

You are organizing a conference for your company. Write a letter to a colleague asking him/her to give a presentation during the conference. -Describe what this conference is about -Why you want him/her to give a presentation -Give details about the conference

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

The graph below shoes the number of overseas visitors to three different areas in a Europian country between 1987 and 2007.

Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.