Some people believe that if people are allowed to buy guns, they will be able to protect themselves and the crime rate can be lower. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

#people #guns #crime #rate #disagree？

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In recent times crimes have increased. It is a highly debatable issue whether

people

are allowed to buy

guns

, or whether it has a negative impact on

society

This

essay will outline the risks of

this

phenomenon and provide my opinion.I don't agree that

guns

are necessary for everyone. There are a lot of bad effects of having

guns

. If

people

are allowed to buy

guns

, they will make

society

more dangerous. It means the number of crimes would probably increase

due to

the misuse of the

gun

. So, not everyone has the ability to control and deal with it in a safe way.

Moreover

, the policies have only allowed to hold

guns

. Engaging in practice using

guns

, will make

people

more talented in using them.

For example

, the result of conducted research at Glasgow University showed that the rate of

people

who have experience in using

guns

is more than the number of

people

who use them without experience.

Therefore

instead

of buying

guns

, Policies are responsible for

this

action. Another important risk is the lack of awareness in the

society

. The individual may forget to save the

gun

in a safe place,

Then

children can play with it and cause some problems.

For instance

, my friend Fatma put her

gun

on the sofa and her child played with it and

then

he injured himself.

Thus

, the

gun

can boost the sense of anxiety in

society

. In conclusion,

guns

are not important for everyone. Increasing the number of crimes, lack of awareness and lack of experience in using

guns

could be dangerous for

people

Therefore

people

must be aware of

society

's risks and avoid using it in the wrong way.

Submitted by 13570581 on Wed Sep 11 2024

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task achievement

Try to elaborate on your points further. For example, provide more specific examples and evidence to strengthen your argument. This will help in achieving a more complete response to the task.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your paragraphs are well-linked and that ideas flow logically from one to the next. The current essay has a decent structure but could benefit from transitional phrases to improve cohesion.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively outline the main points.

task achievement

The ideas presented are fairly clear and easy to understand, which helps in conveying your opinion convincingly.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

advocate
debate
controversial
firearm
self-defense
crime prevention
deterrence
gun violence
gun control laws
public safety
accidental discharge
suicide prevention
impulsive
accessibility
legislation
firearm regulation
balancing
individual rights
crime rate
violence
arguments
opponents
supporters
proponents
second amendment

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Some people believe that if people are allowed to buy guns, they will be able to protect themselves and the crime rate can be lower. To what extent do you agree or disagree？

In some city’s, there are few controls over the design and construction of new homes and office building so people can build whatever they like. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as sahara desert and atlantic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Some people think the media – television and films – negatively affect people's behaviour. Others do not think so. How do you think the media affects people's behaviour? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.