IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Increasing travels between countries enables people to learn different cultures or to increase tension between people from different countries?

#countries #people #cultures #tension
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In my opinion, increasing travel between
countries
Use synonyms
 brings both positive and negative effects, which
includes
Correct subject-verb agreement
include
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 having opportunities to learn
different
Change preposition
about different
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 cultures and increasing tension in some cases. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
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 hand, travelling to another country will help to experience their culture
such
Linking Words
 as lifestyle, cuisine and costumes.
For example
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, in Islamic
countries
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, women must dress more discreetly than
other
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in other
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countries
Use synonyms
 and
Muslim
Fix the agreement mistake
Muslims
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 do not eat pork
due to
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 the notion that pork is not clean.
This
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 can lead to the fact that travelling to other
countries
Use synonyms
 can make others understand the culture and origin of Muslims.
Therefore
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, international tourism can foster cultural exchange, understanding, and tolerance.
Furthermore
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, it can help break down stereotypes, promote empathy, and build connections between people from different backgrounds.
On the other hand
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, in several cases, global travel can cause tensions between citizens living in cultures that are too different. A few reasons for
this
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 may be language barriers and unfamiliarity with local customs,
this
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 can create misunderstandings or conflicts sometimes.
Moreover
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, incidents of discrimination, xenophobia, or cultural insensitivity can occur when people from different cultures interact without proper knowledge or understanding.
Conclusion
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In conclusion
show examples
, international travel has
just
Rephrase
apply
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had benefits and harm to each individual,
Use synonyms
countries
Fix the agreement mistake
country
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 and the globe.
This
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 depends on the ability and knowledge of each person.
Submitted by alex.vu031002 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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