Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree

#people #music #culture #ages

Some individuals assume that

music

can bond

people

of various cultural backgrounds and age ranges together. I highly agree with

this

statement, and I believe that

this

precious type of art can bring different nations and ages together.

This

activity can affect all types of

people

, not only from young to old ones but

also

, from various cultures. Primarily, the rhythmic nature of

this

activity is pleasant and desirable to all ages from newborns, to old

people

, and can create an enjoyable feeling in their minds;

hence

it is a highly common sense of desire among all individuals, and can bond them together.

For instance

, when a street player plays his musical instrument, we observe that different types of

people

circle the artist to listen to him, disregarding how old they are or what cultural backgrounds they come from, and the

music

itself can attract them and build a little community around the artist.

Moreover

music

is an attractive subject in terms of socializing and communicating, disregarding the race or age. Nowadays,

music

comprises a huge part of

people

’s daily activities, in terms of both listening and playing;

thus

, it is really easy to have a conversation about an interesting and intriguing subject

such

this

, and

people

can socialize for hours on

this

matter. To illustrate, when we meet new

people

and we intend to make friends, asking about their favourite instrument or musical genre is the first thing that comes into our minds to break the ice, and start a pleasant conversation with strangers.

Consequently

, I hold the opinion, that

music

is a proper way to bring different types of humans together. In conclusion, among all the ways to bond dissimilar individuals together, I believe

music

is one of the best ones; because it is not only a common desire among all humans to play or listen to

music

but

also

, it is an intriguing subject to start a dialogue and getting to know new peers.

Submitted by mohammadmgh1381 on Tue Aug 29 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

328 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural diversity
harmony
integration
bridging gaps
foster
ignite
embrace
communicate
celebrate
appreciate
inclusivity
universal language
emotional resonance
shared experiences
intercultural dialogue
intergenerational connections
cultural exchange
catalyst

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Some people say music is a good way of bringing people of different culture and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common. Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages?