Some people think that governments should care more about the elderly while others think they should focus on investing in education for younger people. Discus both views and give your opinion.

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In the world of public policy, there is a divide between
people
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who want more government aid for the elderly and those who think we should focus more on funding
education
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for the young. I side with the letter, believing that the nation’s future rests with the young. Supporters of more aid for the elderly often argue that
society
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has a moral duty to look after its older citizens. They say that these
people
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, who have contributed to
society
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all their lives, deserve a good and dignified retirement.
This
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argument is strengthened by the fact that many elderly
people
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have health problems, which can be expensive and require government help.
Also
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, supporters of
this
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view note that the elderly hold a wealth of wisdom and experience, and so, their welfare is key for societal balance.
This
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view is backed by the belief that a
society
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is measured by how it treats its weakest members, and often, the elderly are in
this
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group. Despite these valid points, I still believe that funding
education
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for the younger generation has more long-lasting benefits, An educated public is the foundation of a forward-thinking
society
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, and so, funding
education
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is like investing in the country’s future.
For example
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, countries like Singapore and Finland, which value
education
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, consistently do better than other countries in various global rankings.
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,
education
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gives young
people
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the skills they need to navigate an increasingly complicated world. In
this
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time of fast technological progress,
this
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is especially important, as those without the necessary skills may find themselves left behind. The argument is not about economic productivity, but about making sure that everyone has the chance to reach their potential and contribute to
society
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in a meaningful way. In conclusion,
while
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there are strong arguments for more governmental aid for the elderly, I think that the benefits of funding
education
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for the young are more extensive. An educated public not only boosts economic progress but
also
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promotes a more inclusive and fair
society
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.
Submitted by itzgurpreetsingh1 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay consistently maintains a clear and logical structure throughout all paragraphs, effectively linking ideas and arguments to support your thesis. This can be enhanced by using a range of discourse markers and syntactical structures that show clear relationships between concepts.
coherence cohesion
Be sure to introduce your topic and your stance on it effectively in the introduction, and provide a clear conclusion that summarizes your argument and restates your opinion. Each paragraph should have a clear purpose and should contribute to the overall argument of the essay.
task achievement
Support your main points with specific and relevant examples. Each argument you provide should be backed by evidence or an example that clearly demonstrates your point. This will add weight to your argument and help the reader understand your perspective more fully. In your essay, aim to include examples that are not only relevant but also varied and detailed.
task achievement
While you have clearly expressed ideas and provided arguments for both sides of the issue, ensure they are fully developed and balanced. Your own opinion should be evident throughout the essay and not just in the conclusion. Additionally, consider exploring the complexity of the prompt more fully by analyzing the implications of each viewpoint and integrating more nuanced arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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