in some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this massage?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In some
contries
Correct your spelling
countries
,
Children
Use synonyms
are told that they can earn everything that they want if they try very hard to get it.
This
Linking Words
massage
Correct your spelling
message
show examples
has several impacts
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
children
Use synonyms
’s
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, if parents advise their
children
Use synonyms
by the quote,
this
Linking Words
is all because they love their kids.
Children
Use synonyms
will become motivated in order to not to give up
easiely
Correct your spelling
easily
in their
life
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, they may attempt to
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not pay attention to the distracters and focus on their own path.
In addition
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
massage
Correct your spelling
message
show examples
can not only support their goals, but
also
Linking Words
can grow a perssistant personality in their
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
character.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, they have to be aware of the fact that they can not always have what they
realy
Correct your spelling
really
want because everything may not happen in the way that we ought to.
Life
Use synonyms
is
unexpectedly
Change the word
unexpected
show examples
and challenging. So,
that is
Linking Words
why we never become
board
Correct your spelling
bored
show examples
in our lifespan. We should tell them,
if
Correct word choice
that if
show examples
they don’t achieve what they want, it doesn’t mean that they are not enough or they are stupid.
While
Linking Words
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it shows that maybe somebody else may deserve that. So, parents should support their
children
Use synonyms
by saying
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
of it because nothing is completely ideal in their
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. They have to figure out how to handle
life
Use synonyms
by trying different methods and paths to find out the best road to achieve what they dream about in their mind. But, they shouldn’t misunderstand that because it
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
depression and can harm
children
Use synonyms
both mentally and physically. In conclusion, many
children
Use synonyms
all over the world are growing
by
Change preposition
up by
show examples
a sentence which
tell
Change the verb form
tells
show examples
them
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not to be
indesesive
Correct your spelling
indecisive
in their way to
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
their goals and
also
Linking Words
they say that there would be
to
Correct quantifier usage
more to
show examples
gain if you
don’t
Wrong verb form
didn’t
show examples
be demanding with yourself. The advantages
are outweigh
Change the verb form
outweigh
show examples
the disadvantages.
Submitted by javadsaady1992 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Encouragement
  • Motivation
  • Determination
  • Work Ethic
  • Persistence
  • Self-esteem
  • Confidence
  • Challenges
  • Unrealistic Expectations
  • Disappointment
  • Frustration
  • Limitations
  • External Factors
  • Pressure
  • Stress
  • Anxiety
  • Mental Health
What to do next:
Look at other essays: