The diagram illustrates main changes that have occurred at West Park Secondary School over a thirty-year period and its proposed development in 2010.

#changes #west #park #school #period #development

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The diagram illustrates the main changes that have occurred at West

Park

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Secondary

School

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over a thirty-year period and its proposed development in 2010.

Overall

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, we can see that the secondary

school

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underwent significant changes throughout the six decades, most notably, the construction of the science block and car

park

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as well as

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the sports field. In 1950, the space of the

school

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was divided into four equal sections (Houses,

School

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, Farmland, and Playground) to facilitate learning, recreational, and accommodation requirements. Since 1980, houses have been demolished to incorporate the construction of the car

park

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and science block adjacent to each other, which helps facilitate academic learning and accommodate other modes of transportation.

In addition

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, the farmland that was located southwest corner has been converted into a sports field to

further

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accommodate the recreational needs

in addition

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to the coexisting playground. In 2010, the sports field located in the left corner of the

school

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was trimmed to more than half of its original size in order to renovate the car

park

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, which now occupies most of the

school

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area.

Submitted by vanshbisht11 on Sat Sep 02 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words park, school with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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4
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

179 words

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The diagram illustrates main changes that have occurred at West Park Secondary School over a thirty-year period and its proposed development in 2010.

In some culture are often told they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. what are the advantages and more disadvantages of giving children these massages?

The government should control the Internet to reduce cyber crime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that managers are responsible for the company's success, while others think various features of the organization play vital role in it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

5.An increasing number of people are changing their careers. What are the reasons? Do you think it is positive or negative?