The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

#process #sugar #cane

The graph illustrates the process

how

Change preposition

of how

show examples

sugar

cane

change

Fix the agreement mistake

changes

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sugar

by manufacturing.

Overall

,the process consists of seven steps of various time

length

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lengths

show examples

,changing the

sugar

canes into

sugar

ready to use.

First,

sugar

canes

Fix the agreement mistake

cane

show examples

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

farmed and growing for a period of 12 to 18 months.After growing mature, it is harvested by

the

Correct article usage

apply

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means of two ways, either by hand or by some special vehicles.The third step is that the

ingrediants

Correct your spelling

ingredients

are put into a machine and crushed into

liquid

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a liquid

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form called juice. The fourth step is to purify the juice through Limestone filters.

Correct your spelling

The

show examples

purified liquid goes through

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evaporator which

put

Add a missing verb

is put

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on extreme heat in

oder

Correct your spelling

order

to change

liquid

Correct article usage

the liquid

show examples

into

syrup

Then

the

syrup

is centrifuged to

seperate

Correct your spelling

separate

sugar

crystals from

syrup

Add an article

the syrup

show examples

.After drying and cooling, water in

syrup

is evaporated and the crystal

leave

Fix the agreement mistake

leaves

show examples

at the end

sugar

which can be packed and ready for sale.

Submitted by huangzijun2293 on Sat Sep 02 2023

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar, syrup with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

148 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane.

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online rather than face to face. Is this a positive or a negative development?

The role of prisons should be to punish criminals who have committed serious crimes. Training courses and education offered to prisoners are a waste of tax payers' money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that success is about hard work and determination. Others think that success has a connection with money and personal appearance. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. (Steve no copyright)

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

Some people think that children should aim to be the best at what they are doing while others believe it is not necessary for them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.