Some suggest than young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the itadvantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this.

#suggest #people #job #years #school #university #itadvantages

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Nowadays lots of students intend to work when they are at school before they prepare to start university life. To some extent, I think there are many advantages for those who get a task at

this

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stage, and I want to discuss both sides of

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point. As neither schools nor universities do not teach life skills, from my perspective, it seems an adequate idea to encourage them to find a suitable job at an early age. Somehow, when youngsters walk into a responsible world, it not only makes them ready to be a part of the community but

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gives them the confidence to face potential troubles and issues that they will face in future. As there is no instruction for it in the educational system.

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, as they aim to do their career properly they will become more reliable.

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, they will be paid and they will find the money worthwhile.

On the other hand

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, they will become occupied with extra activity, which influences their marks, and they will get fewer opportunities to study.

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, the impact would be devastating.

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, what if they engaged with something that was beyond their capability and disappointed them?

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, they may be abused or exploited, because employees might be underpaid them. All things have been considered. So there are many merits and demerits for youth to work amid training levels. In my view, it is a positive action.

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, I mentioned the pros and cons. Even though, Generally, I am a big fan of

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scenario, because It would socialize Individuals ,

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will disappear their self-consciousness, etc.

Submitted by reihanetorfe on Sat Sep 02 2023

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task response

Your essay demonstrates some understanding of the given topic, but the arguments and examples could be more focused and well-developed. Try to address both the advantages and disadvantages in more detail, and provide more specific examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear and well-organized structure. It's important to have a clear introduction that introduces the topic and presents the main points, and a conclusion that summarizes the key points made in the essay. Additionally, use linking words and cohesive devices to connect ideas and create a more cohesive flow of information.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

268 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

gap year: A year taken off between school and university to work or travel.
real-world skills: Practical abilities gained through actual experience rather than academic study.
financial burdens: The financial pressures or difficulties one might face.
career goals: Objectives or aspirations related to one's professional path.
strengths and weaknesses: Positive and negative attributes or abilities.
maturity: The state of being fully developed in one's personality or emotional capabilities.
responsibility: The state or fact of having a duty to deal with something or oversee someone.
communication skills: The ability to convey or share ideas and feelings effectively.
time management: The ability to use one's time effectively or productively.
organizational skills: The ability to plan and arrange activities or tasks systematically.

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Some suggest than young people should take a job for a few years between school and university. Discuss what the itadvantages and disadvantages might be for people who do this.

Fully explain your ideas

A child how he grows up depends on how they were brought up by their parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Computer games are becoming very popular among children of all ages and nationalities. Parents say they are concerned because these games have little educational value and many harmful effects. Do you agree or disagree?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.

In the past important knowledge and history were stored in the museum. Nowadays information is freely available on the Internet therefore is no longer a need for museums. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that success is the best way to measure intelligence. Others believe that it can be measured through other useful parameters. Do you agree or disagree?