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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The given lie graph illustrate the amount of partiipants in 4 kinds of sports in particular inhabitant from 1985 to 2005.

The given lie graph illustrate the amount of partiipants in 4 kinds of sports in particular inhabitant from 1985 to 2005.
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The given line graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
participants
Use synonyms
 in 4 kinds of sports
in particular
Linking Words
 inhabitant from 1985 to 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, badminton and rugby experienced a downward trend and tennis’s
participants
Use synonyms
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 a quick increase over the period,
while
Linking Words
 basketball
maintain
Wrong verb form
maintained
show examples
 the
participants
Use synonyms
 rate.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
at
Change the preposition
in
show examples
 the beginning, rugby
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the most choices
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, but it
was
Wrong verb form
has been
show examples
repalced
Correct your spelling
replaced
 by tennis since 1995. With regard to the two sports which show
decrease
Add an article
a decrease
show examples
 in
participants
Use synonyms
, both badminton and
rubgy
Correct your spelling
rugby
 were at roughly 55
people
Use synonyms
 and 250
people
Use synonyms
, respectively. In terms of badminton, it
decline
Wrong verb form
declined
show examples
 after beginning to 45
people
Use synonyms
,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 it varied to rise to 50
people
Use synonyms
 and continued to
levelled-off
Correct your spelling
levelled off
show examples
to
Change preposition
by
show examples
 the year
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2005.
Likewise
Linking Words
,
rubgy’s
Correct your spelling
rugby’s
participants
Use synonyms
,
although
Linking Words
 started with the most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, it declined quickly and
steady
Change the word
steadily
show examples
 over the entire
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
 from 250 to 50
people
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
 year. Turning toward
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the basketball sport that fluctuated in the first 15 years old and reached a peak of 100
participants
Use synonyms
 in 2000, after which it decreased slowly to under 100
participants
Use synonyms
 in 2005. As for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
tennis sport, it stood at 150
people
Use synonyms
 at the beginning before rising significantly and exceeded rugby at 200
people
Use synonyms
 in 1995, it continued to increase to approximately 225
people
Use synonyms
 in 2005,
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 the sport
has
Correct pronoun usage
that has
show examples
 the most
participants
Use synonyms
.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 90%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words participants, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "amount" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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