STUDIES SHOW THAT CRIME RATE ARE LOWER AMONG THOSE WITH EDUCATION DEGREES. THEREFORE, THE BEST WAY TO REDUCE THE CRIME RATE IS TO EDUCATE CRIMINALS WHILE THEY ARE STILL IN PRISON. TO WHAT EXTENT DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Education
Use synonyms
degrees are solutions to lower
crime
Use synonyms
rates. There are a lot of aspects that are being used by
people
Use synonyms
to decrease the criminal rate. Sometimes, giving
criminals
Use synonyms
some knowledge is the best way to reduce it.
This
Linking Words
condition might be ineffective because it is just impacting
criminals
Use synonyms
, not all
people
Use synonyms
. If
criminals
Use synonyms
are being educated in
prison
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
will impact
criminals
Use synonyms
only.
People
Use synonyms
outside
prison
Use synonyms
are not being educated either.
This
Linking Words
condition has only one benefit to
criminals
Use synonyms
themselves, not to all
people
Use synonyms
. The
crime
Use synonyms
rate will still be high because the
education
Use synonyms
is being given after
crime
Use synonyms
is affected in society. It can be hard for the judge and the police to manage
this
Linking Words
. When
criminals
Use synonyms
have good manners, they can go outside
prison
Use synonyms
and become good
people
Use synonyms
. There are still bad
people
Use synonyms
without a good
education
Use synonyms
in law or legal outside
prison
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
way might be ineffective in handling the
crime
Use synonyms
rate in real
life
Use synonyms
. One of the best factors to tackle
crime
Use synonyms
is higher
education
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
will learn how to avoid several problems with
this
Linking Words
aspect. Teachers or lecturers usually say something true to handle those problems without being involved in
crime
Use synonyms
.
Besides
Linking Words
, parents should teach their children about
life
Use synonyms
so they can manage or pick the right path when they are growing up. If youngsters have good knowledge about legal from a young age, they shall stay away from illegal acts.
Then
Linking Words
, the Police should give some awareness to
people
Use synonyms
, not only in
prison
Use synonyms
but
also
Linking Words
to all
people
Use synonyms
. The topic of awareness can be comprehensive so it will affect all aspects of
life
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
Linking Words
, some negative aspects occur, if
education
Use synonyms
is only given in
prison
Use synonyms
. I think the best solution to handle
this
Linking Words
problem is to give awareness to all
people
Use synonyms
in real
life
Use synonyms
. They can feel and sense the good choices in
life
Use synonyms
so
people
Use synonyms
can stay away from
crime
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by irhamtaufiqurrahman on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure of the essay by organizing the points in a more coherent manner to enhance the flow of ideas.
task achievement
Ensure that all aspects of the task are addressed fully and provide more specific examples to support the points made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: