Many adults nowadays prefer spending their free time playing computer games. Why do they do this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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A good number of grown-ups like to spend their spare time playing
computer
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or video
games
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nowadays.
This
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essay will discuss how
entertainment
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value is the primary contributor to
this
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trend. Personally, I believe
this
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is a positive
development
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because it sharpens the cognitive
skills
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of those
adults
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.
Computer
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games
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are played chiefly for their immersive and
entertainment
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value. Individuals can gain an extremely immersive and pleasant experience by playing
computer
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games
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. The
games
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, in fact, offer players with interactive gameplay mechanics, visually attractive graphics and sound, and engaging storylines.
That is
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why,
adults
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are more likely to choose to spend leisure time playing
computer
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games
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as a means of
entertainment
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that helps them to unwind after a hectic day. A good example here is my case. I often play the Age of Empire game because it allows me to immerse myself into the game, providing a vast world to explore and embark on epic conquest,
thus
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helping me to escape from daily stress and shift my focus onto the challenging tasks within the virtual world for a short
while
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. Playing
computer
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games
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reaps benefits to
adults
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by enhancing cognitive
skills
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and
that is
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why I consider it a positive
development
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. Many
games
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, especially those in the simulation and strategy genres, present gamers with an epic of challenges that require critical reasoning, problem-solving, and decision-making competencies to devise best-laid plans in order to overcome them. Not only are these transferable
skills
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valuable in the gameplay world but
also
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can be applied in real-life problem-solving situations. Take “Civilization”
for example
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. The game offers players a series of challenges that require cognitive
skills
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to examine situations, determine obstacles, and design effective strategies to overcome them. In conclusion,
adults
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today tend to play digital
games
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because these
games
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are the modern form of
entertainment
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to relieve the pressures of life, and I think
this
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is a positive
development
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as it fosters cognitive
development
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.
Submitted by shaikha.alsaif4 on

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task
Ensure that all points in your argument are well-supported with specific examples. For instance, adding a few more varied examples can strengthen your points about cognitive skill enhancement.
coherence
Work on the transitions between paragraphs to make the essay flow more smoothly. Using more linking words or phrases can help in achieving better cohesion.
task
Ensure that your response fully addresses all parts of the prompt. Discuss both why adults prefer gaming and whether you think this is positive or negative. You have done well, but providing a deeper analysis on both aspects can give you a higher score.
coherence
Try to add a more comprehensive conclusion that summarizes the key points discussed in the essay.
coherence
The introduction clearly outlines the topic and your position, which is excellent for setting the stage for your argument.
task
You have provided clear reasons for why adults play computer games, such as the immersive and entertainment value, which is a strong point in supporting your argument.
task
The essay includes specific examples, like your personal experience with 'Age of Empire' and the game 'Civilization', which effectively illustrate your points.
coherence
The conclusion restates your position clearly, which helps in giving the essay a sense of closure.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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