In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays, a lot of nations of
population
have long Add an article
the population
lives
more
than Correct quantifier usage
apply
the
past. Some Change preposition
in the
people
argue that the
long Correct article usage
apply
lives
bring problems for countries. Others the long lives
create postive
effect for society and many older Correct your spelling
positive
people
. I strongly believe that a lot of people
's long lives
are negative for sociaty
Correct your spelling
society
environmemt
.
On the one hand, the elderly Correct your spelling
environment
people
had many experience
. Knowledge Change to a plural noun
experiences
form
the experience Correct your spelling
from
are
useful for my hometown. BecauseCorrect subject-verb agreement
is
,
their knowledge is very Remove the comma
apply
deeply
and Change the word
deep
widely
like Change the word
wide
library
. Add an article
a library
the library
Also
, they work to
hard for Replace the word
too
hometown
. Correct pronoun usage
their hometown
For example
, they are cleaning to walkroad and bou
stop every morning. And, They are Correct your spelling
bus
petrolling
to near the schools, like Correct your spelling
patrolling
corss
Correct your spelling
cross
road
or dangerous areas. Fix the agreement mistake
roads
The
Correct article usage
Working
working
is necessary for my hometown.
Capitalize word
Working
on
the other hand,the elderly Capitalize word
On
people
working are not volanteer. They recived
money.The government pay for their Correct your spelling
received
working
. The money is our Replace the word
work
tax
. If the elderly
Correct quantifier usage
number of elderly
people
are increase
. the nation's Wrong verb form
increases
tax
would span to their cost increasing
.Replace the word
increase
Becasue
, they most do not have jobs and they do not pay to Correct your spelling
Because
tax
. So, many countires's
Change noun form
countries'
tax
do not Fix the agreement mistake
taxes
possible
Change the word
possibly
used
more important Wrong verb form
use
such
like
for Change preposition
as
chidren
and for Correct your spelling
children
alone
mother. Correct pronoun usage
their alone
Also
, Add an article
the country
a country
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
side
which was leaving younger people
after lives
a lot of elderly people
more
than Correct quantifier usage
apply
cities
. That Change preposition
in cities
bring
Change the verb form
brings
problem
of Add an article
the problem
enblanced
development between cities and Correct your spelling
enhanced
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
side
. The country
Correct your spelling
countryside
side
do
not increase the population.That will bring more severe Change the verb form
does
problem
. The Fix the agreement mistake
problems
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
side
do
not care for Change the verb form
does
thier
villages. Correct your spelling
their
Becasue
, the Correct your spelling
Because
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
side
do not working
Change the verb form
work
people
.
In conclusion, the mentioned the above, the
elderly Correct article usage
apply
people
increasing will led
to many Change the verb form
lead
be led
sociaty
Correct your spelling
social
problem
. In many countries would need to prepare Change to a plural noun
problems
to
the Change preposition
for
problem
.Submitted by moneekun on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite