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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph compares the sales of different music formats from 1994 to 2006. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph compares the sales of different music formats from 1994 to 2006. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#sales #music #formats #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph illustrates the
sales
Use synonyms
 volume of 3 different
music
Use synonyms
 formats in the US from 1994 to 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is
clearly
Change the word
clear
show examples
 that
music
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
 of
CDs
Use synonyms
 and
Cassettes
Use synonyms
 reduced
while
Linking Words
 that of digital
music
Use synonyms
 increased.
In addition
Linking Words
, digital
music
Use synonyms
 became the most popular
music
Use synonyms
 format in 2006. In 1994,
CDs
Use synonyms
sales
Use synonyms
 numbers started at roughly 450
million
Use synonyms
 before
peaked
Wrong verb form
peaking
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 at 800
million
Use synonyms
 in 2000.
In contrast
Linking Words
, in the same period, the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Cassettes
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 started at 400
million
Use synonyms
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 hit a trough at nearly 100
million
Use synonyms
. The
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
 of digital
music
Use synonyms
 remained constant at around 5
million
Use synonyms
. From 2000 to 2006,
Use synonyms
CDs
Fix the agreement mistake
CD
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
 volume experienced a slump from its peak to only 300
million
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, there was a gradual decline from 100
million
Use synonyms
 to nearly 5
million
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Use synonyms
Cassettes
Change the noun form
cassette
show examples
sales
Use synonyms
 volume.
However
Linking Words
, the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 digital
music
Use synonyms
 showed a slight climb from around 5
million
Use synonyms
 to 10
million
Use synonyms
 before overtook that of
cassettes
Use synonyms
 in 2002 and that of
CDs
Use synonyms
 in 2004. By 2006, digital
music
Use synonyms
 had reached a peak of 750
million
Use synonyms
 units sold, which made it become the most preferred
music
Use synonyms
 format.
Submitted by trungkien.ktdn.nt on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 86%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, music, cds, cassettes, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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