Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam'. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars

It is thought by many
people
that
car
ownership has risen significantly over the past three decades and cities have been occupied by traffic. I think it is fair enough to mention that amount of
people
owning
cars
has increased simply because
cars
become more affordable to buy. I can provide a few solutions for reducing
car
use. First of all, comfort plays a huge role in public vehicles and making the ride more pleasant may solve the problem of overusing
cars
. If the
buses
or subway are properly equipped with Wi-Fi spots, cosy seats, and a well-functioning air-conditioning system it will positively impact
people
’s views of a mode of public transit. Another suggestion is to provide more stops and make routes convenient for each city district. Since many
people
struggle with finding the right stop near their houses, building additional stops may push them to use public transport
instead
of the
car
.
In addition
, organizing suitable bus or metro routes that can easily provide a clear direction to any place in town, may
also
be a beneficial aspect of choosing public transport.
Furthermore
, It should be noted that increasing the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
buses
can
also
lead to reducing
car
usage. The reason for
that is
the bigger numbers of
buses
makes them less crowded and obviously more comfortable for citizens. Considering that many
people
choose their own
cars
simply because they feel anxious among the big crowd,
this
suggestion can be potentially the most important.
To sum up
, it is readily apparent that there are many ways to discourage
people
from using their
cars
by providing
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
comfortable conditions in public services, convenient routes over the cities and increasing the numbers of
buses
to make them less crowded.
Submitted by Abdu.abetayev on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion. Each paragraph presents a separate idea, which is explained and supported by examples.
task achievement
Your essay does a good job addressing the task's questions. However, the response could be slightly more direct in responding to whether you agree with the initial statement about cities turning into 'one big traffic jam'.
lexical resource
You did a good job at implementing a variety of vocabulary and complex sentences. However, there were a few minor slips in word choice, such as 'figures of buses' instead of 'number of buses'.
grammatical range
Your sentences are composed of a mix of simple and complex form with only minor issues in their structure. The minor grammatical errors does not impede comprehension though.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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