Government gives a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere.

#government #support #artists #people #waste #money

Some would argue that the

money

used by the state to support

people

working in the artistic area is a good option,

while

others say that

this

is a big waste and should be used in other places.

Although

artists need large amounts of financial resources to do their work, I believe that it is better to use the

money

for more important things. On the one hand, when artist finish their career is very difficult for them to find a job that fit them, so they do not have a source of income. If the

government

assists them with funds, they are able to create new products, allowing different

people

to enjoy their creativity and sell it to those who really understand the art.

For example

, in some places in China, the

government

every year will perform an exhibition with paintings and drawings.

However

, I believe that

this

is not the best way to use their

money

On the other hand

, in every country, there are other

people

who need more of

this

money

. Homeless and poor

people

, who have no place to live or enough food to eat are in danger of dying at any moment. The

government

should give financial, and educational support to these

people

so that in the future they can find a job and not need more help.

For instance

, the Spanish

government

studies cases of families that have difficulties and gives monetary support to those who need it, and

this

has resulted in an increase in the wealth of the whole country. I believe

this

is a way to use the

money

is preferable because it can help more families and the country as a whole. In conclusion,

although

artistic

people

need funds for the creation of their products, poor

people

who have a risk of losing their lives at any moment need more help from the

government

Submitted by elenazheng1211 on Tue Sep 05 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

315 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Government gives a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some people think it is better to wear uniforms at workplace? Do you agree or disagree.

Some people believe that preventing an illness is better than curing it. Researching and treating diseases is too costly, so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. To what extent do you agree?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that we learn best through in person interaction with the teacher in a classroom. Others believe that learning is more effective. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

These days it is neither possible nor desirable for most people to stay in the same job throughout their working life. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?