Ensuring that children have regular physical exercise should be the responsibility of parents, and therefore schools should not waste valuable school time having sports lessons as part of curriculum. To what extent do you agree?

Some people argue that physical
exercise
is a parental responsibility and that educational institutions should focus on academics rather than sports. I disagree with
this
statement because
schools
play an essential role in providing
children
with opportunities for physical activity, which is crucial for their
overall
development.
To begin
with, formal institutions have a responsibility role to ensure students receive regular
exercise
. One reason is not all
children
have the opportunity for physical
exercise
outside the school, particularly those from disadvantaged backgrounds. In Australia,
for example
, sports lessons provide structured and equal opportunities for physical activity, regardless of a child's home environment.
Moreover
,
this
underscores the importance of
schools
in promoting physical health.
Therefore
,
education
institutions should prioritise physical
education
to ensure all
children
are physically active which can be beneficial for their future.
Additionally
, physical activity contributes to academic performance and
overall
well-being for students.
This
is because
exercise
has been shown to improve concentration, reduce stress, and enhance cognitive function, which benefits academic performance.
For instance
, research has found that peers who engage in regular
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
perform better in their studies.
Furthermore
,
this
highlights the academic advantages of physical
education
which is useful for students' performance in
schools
.
Hence
, sports lessons should remain part of the curriculum to support academic achievement. In conclusion,
while
parents play an important role in ensuring
children
are physically active,
schools
have a key responsibility in providing physical
education
.
Thus
, I strongly believe that physical
exercise
should remain a central part of the curriculum
due to
its benefits for health, academic and life skills.
Submitted by anggiagni on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

complete response
Consider further expanding on points to fully explore the complexity of the argument, potentially addressing counterarguments or alternative views.
clear comprehensive ideas
Try to make your tone slightly more formal and academic throughout the essay to enhance clarity and comprehensive ideas.
logical structure
The essay is well-structured with clear paragraphs that are logically organized, contributing to a high coherence and cohesion score.
introduction conclusion present
A clear introduction and conclusion frame the essay effectively, ensuring the reader understands the overall argument and its resolution.
supported main points
The main points are well-supported with examples, particularly the reference to Australia and research findings, adding depth to the argument.
relevant specific examples
Relevant examples like the role of schools in Australia and research findings enhance the argument, providing specific evidence for claims made.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • structured environment
  • inclination
  • teamwork
  • sportsmanship
  • cooperation
  • academic time
  • intellectual development
  • after-school activities
  • relegated
  • family bond
  • supervised
  • well-being
  • equipment
  • expertise
  • professional physical education teachers
  • safe and beneficial
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!