3. Some people say that the best way to reduce traffic and pollution is the government to increase tax of petrol (gasoline). Do you think there are more benefits or more drawbacks?

Some
people
believe that the most effective way to decrease traffic and pollution problems is for the government should
tax
more on petrol. In my opinion, I think
this
has more advantages than disadvantages. To start with, there is a significant downside which is the standard of
people
's living will be decreased because they have the extra bill on petrol
tax
to pay if they use their vehicles, so they will not have enough money for other valuable parts of life.
For example
,
according to
the latest survey conducted by Bangkok University, 80% of Thai
people
are facing financial problems
due to
a 30%
tax
increase on top of fuel costs. The more
people
have to pay more taxes, the more they are struggling and cannot afford to buy good
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
quality things for themselves and their families. Despite the drawbacks, there are more benefits to the countries because the governments will have more funds to investigate or improve other facilities
such
as public transportation or hospitals.
For instance
,
according to
the latest news, it was reported that in 2022 the UK government collected 40% more funds from petrol vehicles
tax
, so they spent those to improve their railway line by extending to the rural areas.
Apart from
this
, it is most likely
people
are using fewer private cars because of high
tax
collection and changing their attitude toward using public
transport
.
As a result
of
this
fewer cars will be on the roads and public
transport
such
as trains will be more popular among the population because of the extension network to the countryside. To illustrate, from the survey, it was revealed that
people
changed their way of commuting to work by 50% choosing public
transport
while
10% of the UK population are investing more in electric cars. The more
people
use clean energy vehicles or public
transport
, the fewer problems with traffic congestion and pollution. In conclusion, I would
therefore
argue that
although
there are disadvantages to the current trend, they are outweighed by the advantages.
Submitted by patinyajaithan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a well-rounded understanding of the topic. However, try to use more transitional phrases to smoothly guide the reader between paragraphs.
task achievement
While your essay effectively addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of increased petrol tax, try to delve deeper into potential counterarguments or consider alternative solutions more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction is clear and sets up the discussion effectively. The conclusion succinctly summarizes your main points and restates your opinion, which adds to the coherence of the essay.
task achievement
You provided specific examples and statistical data which strongly support your arguments. This enhances the persuasiveness of your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • excise tax
  • carbon footprint
  • sustainable transportation
  • public transit
  • eco-friendly alternatives
  • commuter benefits
  • fuel efficiency
  • environmental levy
  • traffic congestion
  • renewable energy sources
What to do next:
Look at other essays: