Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that thia would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The question of whether more
facilities
dedicated to
sports
activities or other solution for improving public
health
has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
more significant share of impact on the region’s medical state has ignited fervent controversy among
people
.
While
it is crucial to note the importance of medical breakthroughs and what they have to offer for the well-being of the population, it is my firm belief that a larger number of
sports
facilities
is required for the definite improvement
on
Change preposition
of
show examples
, not only physical
health
, but
also
the mental
health
of
people
. The most crucial element to consider in the welfare improvement of
people
is the prevention phase. For decades, the norms in any medical-related
fields
Fix the agreement mistake
field
show examples
has been
best
Correct word choice
better
show examples
to prevent than to cure. The one and only
system
dedicated to
this
matter is the immune
system
built-in
Correct your spelling
built
show examples
for every
humans
Change to a singular noun
human
show examples
, and the only ones who can actually have any
influences
Fix the agreement mistake
influence
show examples
on
this
system
are themselves. By partaking in any physical
activities
Fix the agreement mistake
activity
show examples
, the immune
system
is improved
overall
. If more places to participate in
sports
were to be added,
people
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
be motivated to partake in the
activies
Correct your spelling
activities
, leading to the ultimate outcome of
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
better public
health
overall
.
Nevertheless
, proponents of the opposing view argue
with
Change preposition
against
show examples
this
change in
facilities
. They contend that there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
more to
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the ideal welfare state than simply
just
Rephrase
apply
show examples
working out more. The importance of pharmaceutical products is simply unable to be ignored, as penicillin has shown back in
20th
Change the article
the 20th
show examples
century, and the best way to achieve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
health
completion is through funds
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
medicines, placebos, the list goes up.
This
is a credible point,
however
, they have failed to acknowledge the dangers behind
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reliant on medicines. The alternatives for medical products are gonna run out someday as we are trying to cope with the ever-changing diseases
occuring
Correct your spelling
occurring
to humans on a yearly basis. The solution that actually should be considered, is the dependence on the immune
system
that humans already
posessed
Correct your spelling
possess
, the
system
they can actually rely on themselves,
instead
of the scientists in their laboratory mixing chemicals. It is
the
Change the word
my
show examples
unwavering opinion of mine that a greater number of
facilities
for
sports
is the
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
superior option in the debate of public healthcare.
Besides
the sole purpose of simply improving physical
health
, mental
health
is
also
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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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