Some parents believe that watching TV and playing computer games should be limited and substituted by reading books. Do you agree or disagree ?

#parents #tv #computer #games #books

It is widely believed that watching

and playing

computer

games

should be limited and substituted by reading

books

. Personally, I can neither completely agree nor disagree with

this

statement for a variety of reasons. I partly agree that watching

and playing

computer

games

should be limited and substituted by reading

books

This

is because, the book is

source

Correct article usage

a source

show examples

documentary extremely essential for

chidren

Correct your spelling

children

, when reading

books

they can learn a lot of knowledge from the book

such

as skills

managerment

Correct your spelling

management

times, skills

managerment

Correct your spelling

management

emotion

Fix the agreement mistake

emotions

show examples

and many

lesson

Change to a plural noun

lessons

show examples

about economic, social which

Add a missing verb

are so

show examples

helpful for

children

in the future.

Besides

, reading

books

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

children

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

imagine diversity and

increased

Wrong verb form

increase

show examples

creative

Replace the word

creativity

show examples

For example

, one of the richest billion people

such

as Bill Gates often

reading

Wrong verb form

reads

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

hundered

Correct your spelling

hundreds

books

Change preposition

of books

show examples

every

years

Change to a singular noun

year

show examples

, the

books

help him relax and

thinking

Wrong verb form

think

show examples

about

stragery

Correct your spelling

strategy

for his company.

On the other hand

, I disagree with the viewpoint that watching

and playing

computer

games

should be limited and substituted by reading

books

This

means that watching

and playing

computer

games

also

have some benefits. In fact, watching

help

children

update some news and

informations

Change the wording

information

pieces of information

show examples

caution

Change preposition

with caution

show examples

which

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

children

can to

protected

Change the form of the verb

protect

show examples

themself.

In addition

, playing

computer

games

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

children

connected

Wrong verb form

connect

show examples

with their friends,

reduce

Correct word choice

and reduce

show examples

stresses

Fix the agreement mistake

stress

show examples

after learning in school.

For example

, my friends and I often

playing

Wrong verb form

play

show examples

video game together to relax

Change preposition

for 1

show examples

-2 hours a day,

this

help us have

chance

Correct article usage

a chance

show examples

talk

Fix the infinitive

to talk

show examples

anymore

Rephrase

show examples

comfortable

Change the word

comfortably

show examples

. In conclusion,

although

some parents believe that watching

and playing

computer

games

should be limited and substituted by reading

books

. I'm convinced that

children

should

reading

Change the verb form

read

be reading

show examples

books

more than watching

and playing

computer

games

. Because the benefit of the book is huge for

future

Correct article usage

the future

show examples

children

Submitted by yeshomeclass on Thu Sep 07 2023

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

288 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that now is the best time in history to be living. what is your opinion about this? what other time in history would be interesting to live in?

Many people are afraid to leave their home because of crime. Some believe that more actions should be taken to prevent crime. While others feel that little action can be done to stop crime. What is your opinion?