Young people who commit crime should be punished the same way as adults who commit crime. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, young
people
Use synonyms
have many changes to approach
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social media, so they can
easy to
Replace the word
easily
show examples
make guilties. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
problem
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
young
people
Use synonyms
should be punished
similar
Change the adjective
similarly
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
adults when they have guilties.
Firstly
Linking Words
, An argument against the
existance
Correct your spelling
existence
of commit would be the lack of
responsible
Replace the word
responsibility
show examples
for young
people
Use synonyms
, which means they
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
not enough abilities to take
controll
Correct your spelling
control
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. It is because almost
us
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
when we were young,
Correct pronoun usage
our parent
show examples
parent
Fix the agreement mistake
parents
show examples
take
Wrong verb form
took
show examples
care
and
Change preposition
of and
show examples
try
Wrong verb form
tried
show examples
to ignore
outside
Correct article usage
the outside
show examples
world with us.
For instance
Linking Words
, a young
men
Correct the article-noun agreement
man
show examples
will
tends
Change the verb form
tend
show examples
to do things that he
wanted
Wrong verb form
wants
show examples
, it can be failed to compare with laws in that country. As
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
result, we should not
take
Verb problem
apply
show examples
punished
Wrong verb form
punish
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
young
people
Use synonyms
because
they
Add a verb
arethey
werethey
show examples
still young.
Submitted by hoaan2409 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: