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Band 5.5

Nowadays, in many countries, women have full-time jobs. Therefore, it is logical to share household tasks evenly between men and women. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#countries #women #jobs #household #tasks #men
Modern
women
 in most countries are working in all sorts of different fields.
Hence
, it is extremely important for
both
 partners to share the household chores equally. I agree with the given statement as
both
 parties deserve
time
 off once they finish their respective
jobs
, and by dividing housework they can save some
time
 for each other or for their friends and family.
To begin
 with, Nowadays, independent
women
 like to do full-
time
jobs
instead
 of spending their
time
 at home without doing anything.
Moreover
,
women
 who do
jobs
 like, nursing, flight attendant, banking or criminal case studies often
work
 for long hours; these
jobs
 need more focus and dedication, which is not only
time
-consuming but
also
 requires a lot of energy to finish the
work
.
For instance
, a survey conducted by BBC in 2016 showed that men and
women
 who help each other in everyday households are more likely to stay together for longer periods of
time
.So, it is necessary for
both
 of them to divide the
work
 equally.
In addition
, it can
also
 help to strengthen their bond, as over
time
 they develop respect for each other. In many countries, men think highly of their
women
 and show their love by cooking food for their working wives, as a
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
result they get it back whenever comes to favour. Not only that,
time
 is changing as well and
women
 of today want to be self-independent and they want to earn some before they pass their prime.
For example
, the average nurse works around 60 hours per week which is a lot when it comes to other
jobs
hence
, they cannot do much when it comes to housework
work
 so in that case a helpful partner is the only one they can rely on.
To conclude
. I think that, in the modern ,age there should be no
such
 topic where only
women
 have to do household chores, men need to participate as well.
This
 will help
both
 of them in the long run.
Submitted by bbaljinderbrar213 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction directly addresses the topic and provides a clear thesis statement. Conclusion should summarize the main points and restate the position on the issue.
task achievement
Provide a clear and complete response to the task, ensuring all aspects of the topic are addressed. Include relevant examples to support the position and ensure ideas are comprehensive and clear.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Gender equality
  • Work-life balance
  • Harmonious relationship
  • Mental health
  • Gender stereotypes
  • Set a good example
  • Cooperate
  • Respectful partnership
  • Overburdened
  • Involvement
  • Household duties
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