It has been suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

The world and science of child-rearing are ever-changing with new "innovative" methods that will produce the most well-rounded child. Some child specialists suggest that elementary school

children

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ought to learn how to propagate vegetables and nurture

animals

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This

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essay will present arguments that

children

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engaging in agriculture hold far more positives than negatives. Those arguing against

this

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proposal would direct our attention down several paths of reasoning. Implementing

such

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an ambitious program needs land nearby where they could raise

animals

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and crops.

This

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land grab might be possible within a school's pre-existing grounds, but there would still need to be significant investment in infrastructure. Schools would

therefore

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have to reallocate a significant portion of their budget, potentially reducing the money for crucial facilities, staff, and teaching resources. Opponents of

this

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new educational model

also

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point out that undeniable animal bacteria and infectious viruses from said land and

animals

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could put schoolchildren's health at high risk because they downplay the importance of hygiene. In tandem with

this

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, insects from the soil once

children

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grow plants might

also

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affect learners' health.

However

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, the advantages of the holistic development of

children

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are overwhelming. Students today spend more

time

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than ever before passively using technological devices. Students will better understand their position within the natural food chain by spending more

time

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outdoors learning about

animals

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and crops. Over

time

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this

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may lead them to adopt environmentally friendlier, compassionate lifestyle choices

such

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as becoming vegetarians or shopping locally rather than buying from large chains.

Moreover

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, the work outdoors would necessarily involve physical exercise. Since obesity is a growing concern in most countries,

this

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time

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outside could help improve physical fitness standards and establish healthy lifelong habits. As a final clenching argument, encouraging

children

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down

this

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agricultural path encouragement might provide

children

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with a precious opportunity to access a healthy and reliable source of food. Taking Vietnam as a prime example of delivering a self-sufficient source of vegetables and meats stemming from school-based farms is likely to help schoolchildren steer clear of food poisoning. In conclusion, despite the money

this

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reform would require, schools should adopt it when possible to achieve a complete education for students. Governments should consider the long-term effects when deciding on

such

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policies.

cemdemircan1283

Sep 10, 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

371 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

primary children
grow vegetables
keep animals
advantages
disadvantages
practical skills development
environmental awareness
health benefits
instilling responsibility
learning about food production
time commitment
maintenance costs
safety concerns
curriculum constraints
limited resources

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It has been suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

it is predicted that robots are going to become increasingly important in our lives. how could robots be used in the future? will this be a positive or negative development?

In many countries, people now wear western-style dress (eg. suits and jeans) rather than more traditional types of clothing. Why is it? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people argue that holding sporting events is beneficial to countries' development. However, other people hold the opposite opinion. Discuss both views and give your own opinion