IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries, people do not recycle waste materials, such as bottles and newpaper. What are the reasons for this? What could be done to solve this problem?

#countries #people #waste #materials #bottles #newpaper
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The environment suffers from severe damage because of the misuse and over-exploitation of the resources on earth.
This
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 problem escalates to its peak when many
people
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 do not recycle or reuse objects. If
this
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 misconduct continues, humans will be the cause of the degradation of the environment and endangerment of exotic
animals
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animal
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 species. In
this
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 essay, I will address some main problems that lead to environmental degradation and share simple ways to solve them. The major reasons why many
people
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 do not recycle
waste
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materials
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 are lack of awareness and facilities. It is quite evident that
this
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 problem is mainly in third-world countries or areas that authorities are unable to access.
Firstly
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, the reason why
people
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 do not recycle is because they are not aware of the benefits of recycling. Recycling leads to less
waste
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 which naturally in turn keeps our surroundings clean.
Besides
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, reusing
materials
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 is cost-efficient and economical. One way to overcome
this
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 obstacle is to set up awareness campaigns with the help of social media or talk to
people
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 in your locality about it. Another action is to write to local newspapers and spread the word. The second challenge is the lack of governmental facilities. Sadly, sometimes many
people
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 have no choice but to throw away
waste
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materials
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 because of the lack of appropriate organizations that can recycle
waste
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.
However
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, the solution is straightforward. We can reuse
waste
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materials
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 at home easily.
For example
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, use old shirts as kitchen rags, use soda bottles and plastic bags for storage, and donate used books to charities or schools. In conclusion, the steps to solve environmental degradation are easy. I believe that it can only be solved if all of us come together and incorporate these practices into our daily lives. Our small steps will create a better earth for generations to come.
Submitted by enrique09molero on

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task response
You have presented some good arguments and points, but some parts of the essay diverge from the topic, leading to a lack of complete response.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear overall structure in the introduction and conclusion. Try to provide a more concise introduction and conclusion that directly address the essay question.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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