There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

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Music

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has a lot of different genres nowadays. The numerous debates about the importance of

music

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people

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lives

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and the need for traditional

music

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over international

music

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. In

this

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particular essay, these views will be discussed. Without a doubt, in the world today,

music

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has become a popular thing involved in

people

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lives

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As a consequence

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of the popularity of

music

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, the birth of many different types of

music

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cannot be avoided. The

music

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popularity is because a lot of

people

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need

music

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in their

lives

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According to

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research and psychology science,

music

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itself has several benefits to

people

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such

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as brain cells that can impact emotional feelings. To illustrate,

music

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can give stimulation to dopamine, one of the brain cells that humans have. When dopamine is triggered by

music

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, it will influence humans’ feelings for feeling happy and can be a mood booster for individuals who felt bad before.

Additionally

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, the popularity of

music

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is mostly dominated by international

music

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such

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as K-Pop, and Western

music

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while

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traditional

music

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has become a rare type of

music

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that is

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listened to by

people

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, nowadays.

This

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situation can lead to the problem of extinction because traditional

music

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is a part of culture in some countries.

Although

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international

music

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looks more attractive than traditional

music

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, individuals still need to preserve

this

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kind of

music

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. It is because traditional

music

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can be an image of some countries about their culture

such

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as foreign

people

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can become aware of a country just from the

music

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. To summarize, as a human, we need

music

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in our

lives

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because it can stimulate our dopamine in brain cells which can influence our emotional feelings.

In addition

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, despite international

music

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being preferred by

people

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this

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day, traditional

music

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is still important because it is a part of culture that

people

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need to preserve to avoid extinction.

zakiyaartanti19Wed Sep 13 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction and conclusion clearly summarize the main points of the essay and provide a clear roadmap for the reader. Organize ideas in a logical sequence to enhance readability and coherence.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples and elaboration to support the main points. Ensure that the ideas are directly addressing the question prompt and have a clear focus on the given topic.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

310 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

emotional release
cultural significance
globalization
cultural exchange
technology
preservation
cultural heritage
social cohesion
expression
consumption
production
traditional music
international music
diversity
identity

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

Teenagers should have regular exams at secondary school as this will prepare them better for life after living school. Do you agree or this agree.

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. however, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

the main part of the population tries to tend to involve lessons which it takes place on the Internet rather than attending offline classes

The demand for coaching services has grown significantly in the digital age, with online coaching platforms becoming prevalent. Some now feel online coaching is a superior option to in-person coaching.