CHILDREN SHOULD ALWAYS FOLLOW THEIR PARENTS’ ADVICE TO WHAT EXTEND DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?
People have been arguing that
children
are required to listen to their parents
under all circumstances, while
others believe that children
are allowed to act on their own. From my perspective, I agree that young adults should speak for their own voices, but only when they have grown to certain
Correct article usage
a certain
ages
.
On one hand, good parenting Fix the agreement mistake
age
set
the fundamental component Wrong verb form
sets
on
future personality and life-long skills for Change preposition
of
the
youngsters. Correct article usage
apply
First,
young people sometimes are inmature
and easily influenced by the outside world, making them less likely to make good decisions. In Correct your spelling
immature
this
case, parents
' advice ensure
their Change the verb form
ensures
children
to
have better insights on various aspects and Fix the infinitive
apply
provide
them Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
more
options to embrace all kinds of challenges. Change preposition
with more
For example
, during the time when I was applying for college admissions, my parents
advised me on considering
multiple choices and helped Change preposition
to consider
prioritize
my advantage toward some majors. Those were some useful and imperative suggestions that boosted me into my dream college and I'm now still grateful for their support.
Correct pronoun usage
me prioritize
On the other hand
, good parenting only exists when parents
allow their children
to think and learn independently instead
of forcing them to listen. Namely, children
should be offered spaces to make decisions on their own and learn from their mistakes. Furthermore
, children
can have more opportunities to explore their interests rather than be easily anxious when they are required to speak for their own voices. For instance
, many Asian parents
strictly regulate thier
youngsters to follow their rules including Correct your spelling
their
bed time
, future career planning, and even their marriage, which can result in a great deal of depression and Correct your spelling
bedtime
also
prevent them from thinking independently.
In conclusion, although
following parents
' advice is crucial during the development of a child, it should occur in an environment that allows sufficient room and opportunities for children
to explore their own preferences and decisions.Submitted by naya840609 on
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task response
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and provides relevant examples. However, make sure to directly address the question and express your viewpoint clearly throughout the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure and logical flow, but there are areas where the connection between ideas can be improved. Ensure that each paragraph is linked cohesively to the next, and use a variety of cohesive devices to make the connections clearer.
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