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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some students take a gap year after graduating high school to work and/or travel. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In today’s modern society, a huge number of
students
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 who finish hịgh school tend to take a
year
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 off in order to travel or gain work experience.
Although
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this
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 trend may have certain demerits, I personally believe that the merits are more considerable. On the one hand, taking a gap
year
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 can be detrimental to
students
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. The main reason is that they set their foot in higher education a
year
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 behind their peers.
As a result
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, it leads to postponing gaining their bachelor’s degree, which can obstruct their future career opportunities.
In other words
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, taking a long break before embarking on their formal university education can result in a loss of momentum.
Therefore
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, some
students
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 find it difficult to come back to the academic environment and struggle to join college coursework after having a
year
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 off.
On the other hand
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, I am firmly convinced that taking a
year
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 off to work or travel is more beneficial.
This
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 is mainly because
students
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 will have lots of opportunities to gain life experience.
This
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 means that they can acquire a deeper insight into new cultures and exposure to different ways of living by making their own money or travelling.
Thus
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, a lot of essential skills that will be valuable to them in the future will be learned. To illustrate
this
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 point, when
students
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 decide to go to work, they can learn many useful skills
such
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 as time management and problem-solving skills, which can be applied to improve academic performance when they come back to university. In conclusion,
while
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 taking a gap
year
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 may discourage them from coming back to university, it is my firm belief that the upside in terms of having a deep insight into themselves and gaining lots of life experience is more significant.

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task response
Make sure to address both the advantages and disadvantages of taking a gap year after high school. Provide a balanced argument by acknowledging the potential drawbacks.
coherence cohesion
The essay demonstrates a clear and logical structure. However, you could improve the introduction and conclusion to make them more impactful.
lexical resource
You have used a good range of vocabulary to express your ideas effectively. However, consider using more varied vocabulary to enhance the overall quality of your writing.
grammatical range
Your grammatical range is commendable, with a few minor grammatical errors. Review your essay for any sentence structure and tense consistency issues.
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