IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

-Smacking the children is the best form of discipline. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#children #form #discipline
There are lots of methods that families
do
Verb problem
use
show examples
 to
discipline
 their
children
. One of these methods is using physical punishments. Some
parents
 believe that beating up their siblings is the best
way
 to
instill
Change the spelling
instil
show examples
discipline
 into their life.
This
 essay will argue slapping the
children
 to
discipline
 is entirely preposterous. Throughout decades most
parents
 agreed that to
discipline
 their
children
, they need to frighten them with physical blows. These types of
parents
 dominate their
children
 with painful slaps and believe that their
children
 will listen to whatever they say after on. Their aim is to make their
children
’s
behaviour
 more convenient and appropriate for society or just affect their
behaviour
 in a positive
way
.
For instance
, if the child does not like their food and splits it out of his/her mouth, they slap them immediately and what they expect is; that when the split food is on their menu again, their
children
 will not spoile, remember their fear and eat it. Indeed, there are specific studies which show that
children
 to
listen
Add the preposition
tolisten
show examples
 their
parents
 in the short term if
werethey
Correct your spelling
were they
 afraid of their
parents
.
Therefore
, slapping or smacking the
children
 cannot be the best
way
 to
discipline
 them but for some ,
parents
 it does help control the
children
’s
behaviour
. Despite the fact that
parents
 can control their
children
 with smacking, the idea that it is the best
way
 to
discipline
 them is completely preposterous. Exposure to violence at an early age can lead to serious psychological problems when they grow up. Studies show that
children
 who are beaten by their families can be either less self-confident or more aggressive and violent toward other people.
Thus
, when
parents
 think they can educate their
children
’s
behaviour
 with violence they may get the opposite results.
This
 essay argued that
parents
 who beat their
children
 to
discipline
 them have a flawed understanding educating of
children
 and a lack
Change preposition
of
show examples
information regarding the results of their actions. In my opinion, smacking the
children
 is the most disrespectful and inefficient
way
 to involve
discipline
 in a child’s life.
Submitted by asik.melliss on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: