Some people think that music plays an important role in the society while others believe it’s simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

#people #music #role #society #it’s #form #entertainment

Music

is a universal language that has been enjoyed by

people

all over the world for centuries. Some

people

believe that

music

is simply a form of entertainment,

while

others believe that it plays a more significant role in

society

. Those who believe that

music

is simply a form of entertainment argue that it is a way to relax and de-stress

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and that it can provide enjoyment and distraction. They may

also

argue that

music

has no intrinsic value

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and that it is not essential for human life. Others believe that

music

plays a more significant role in

society

. They argue that

music

can be used to promote social cohesion, education, social change, and

our

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

emotional well-being.

For example

music

has been used to protest against war, racism, and other forms of injustice.

Music

can

also

be used to celebrate diversity and promote understanding between different cultures. I believe that

music

plays an important role in

society

, beyond simply providing entertainment.

Music

can be used to bring

people

together, promote social change, enhance our emotional well-being, and educate and inform us.

While

music

can

also

be used for negative purposes,

such

as to promote violence or hatred, I believe that the positive benefits of

music

outweigh the negative.

For example

, the civil rights movement in the United States was heavily influenced by

music

. Songs like "We Shall Overcome" and "Blowin' in the Wind" helped to inspire and unite

people

who were fighting for racial equality.

Music

has

also

been used to raise awareness of important social issues

such

as climate change, poverty, and hunger. Artists like Bono and Alicia Keys have used their

music

to speak out about these issues and to encourage

people

to take action. In conclusion, I believe that

music

is a valuable asset to

society

. It can be used to make a positive impact on our lives in many ways.

Submitted by mmhalr33 on Thu Sep 14 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

314 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that music plays an important role in the society while others believe it’s simply a form of entertainment. Discuss both view and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that resources should be spent on protecting wild animals, while others think those would be better used for the human population. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

The average standard of people’s health is likely to be lower in future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement.

Some believe that it is good for a country’s culture to import films and TV programmes, while others think it is better for a country to have their own films and TV programmes. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Social media is popular and used by many people. However, some people think that social media can be bad for mental health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that advertising is highly successful at persuading us to buy things. Others think advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both of these points of view and give your opinion.