Education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Instruction of young individuals is highly emphasised in many nations.

However

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, some communities believe that tutoring

adults

Use synonyms

who do not have proficiency is even more vital, and governments should spend more funds on

this

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. In my opinion, I strongly disagree with the statement given, and I will elaborate on it in

this

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essay. On the one hand, today, some nations have compulsory education so their youngsters can learn knowledge in school.

Moreover

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, when they back to their home, their caregivers can assist them so they learn more.

However

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, some families have inhospitable environments for children in which those people cannot learn reading and writing skills in their house.

For example

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, if their mother or father is an alcoholic, they cannot teach their offspring and some use violence to heat their scions, so they feel afraid to learn everything.

As a result

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, they do not have any bills, so we must spend funds on those young folks.

Furthermore

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, the majority of

adults

Use synonyms

can get a job which can earn salaries, and it is not an illegal thing. But, in many countries, heirs cannot get a job because of the law.

In addition

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, numerous youngsters are influenced by

adults

Use synonyms

, so if they cannot receive cash from their government, they will lose their opportunity to learn literacy.

For instance

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, in South Korea, many old communities cannot write or read because, when they were young individuals, South Korea was at war, so they could not learn literacy. But when they become

adults

Use synonyms

, they can learn writing and reading skills.

Therefore

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, we must protect children from those environments. In conclusion, I completely disagree with

this

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topic. Children who have bad guardians, cannot enough learn literacy.

Conversely

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, many

adults

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can learn those skills because they can get a job

as well as

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pay. So, we should spend money on those young people because they are precious people in our lives.

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Coherence and Cohesion

Would strongly recommend improving the logical structure of your arguments. While your essay introduces the topic and presents your opinion clearly, the ideas presented are not well ordered and there's a lack of coherence in the progression of your argument.

Task Achievement

You have done well in presenting your points and elaborating on them. However, your main points could have been more effectively supported through the use of coherent and logically consistent reasoning.

Task Achievement

While your essay encapsulates a clear response to the task and showcases an attempt at providing relevant examples, the examples provided could be strengthened through being more specific and realistic, and directly supporting your main points.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay introduces the topic and your argument well and concludes effectively. Continue doing this in your future essays.

Task Achievement

Your essay includes a full response to the prompt and you have taken a clear position throughout the essay. Good job on this, keep it up.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

314 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

literacy programs
functional illiteracy
social mobility
inter-generational poverty
workforce development
economic growth
social cohesion
public health
civic participation
resource allocation
national development

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Education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However educating adults who cannot write or read is even more important and governments should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many students choose to study abroad at university level. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad, and give your own opinion about whether it is a good idea.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

International travel is becoming cheaper, and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourists. Do the advantages of increased tourism outweigh the disadvantages?

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

‏t the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adult, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantage of this situation outweigh the disadvantage?