Some countries encourage teenagers to have part-time job and see it as a good thing, while others disagree. Give your opinion and explain both views.

In the modern era, there are a lot of opportunities for doing work. Some nations spurred teenagers to do part-time jobs and argue it is a good thing.
While
Some assert that they should not be encouraged. Personally, I am in favour of the former view and in
this
essay I will discuss both views with relevant examples. To commence with, working in temporary work makes boys and girls more independent. To be more precise, by doing these tasks, someone can earn money by themselves at an early age and they don't need to ask anyone to pay the fees for their college.
For example
, in European countries, most people pay their tuition fees by themselves by working at a petrol pump or any cafe, so how they earn and study together.
Moreover
, I Believe, it
also
gives them enough learning experience which can enhance their skills, despite of low paid salary.
On the other hand
, some nations think that it would lead them to
further
burdens in studies.
In other words
, it can create stress on children
while
they studying and working together which would cause problems in achieving good grades in their schools.
For instance
, when some individuals from Pakistan go abroad for their studies, they do part-time jobs and cannot handle both together.
Hence
, it makes them pressurise. In conclusion,
although
it is a common belief that part-time work creates stress on teenagers
while
studying. Personally I believe, they get more independent and experienced as well.
Submitted by niteshkhan65 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each body paragraph has a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph. Use transition words to guide the reader through the essay and improve coherence and cohesion.
task response
Address both sides of the argument in a balanced way, and support your ideas with relevant examples. Make sure to provide a clear opinion in the introduction and conclusion.

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