The maps below show an industrial area in town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site

The maps below show an industrial area in town of Norbiton, and planned future development of the site
The maps depict the industrial area in the town of Nobition and the future design plan for its development.
Overall
, at the current time, the main constructions in
this
place are factories,
however
, they will be replaced by residential buildings and other amenities like a playground, health care and commercial centre. At present, there is a big roundabout in the central area which links to the East by a main
road
.
In addition
, many factories are constructed along the main
road
to the East and the roundabout. To the North of the town, there is farmland which is separated from the industry by a river. On the South of
this
location, a short
road
connects the roundabout and the
road
which runs from the
West
to the East. In the future, A significant change will replace all the factories as many houses built along the main
road
to the East and to the North
West
of the roundabout.
On the other hand
, the farmland will be abolished and a house will be built
instead
. A bridge to the North and a small
road
to the
West
will be built to bring the convenience of travelling.
Moreover
, there is a minimal change on the short
road
to the South which is a small roundabout that will replace the conjunction which links to the long
road
on the South.
Finally
, a medical centre on the East of the short
road
and some shops on its
West
will be situated as well.
Submitted by lantran180487 on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words road, west with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • industrial area
  • development
  • infrastructure
  • manufacturing
  • facilities
  • transition
  • planning
  • commercial
  • residential
  • renovation
  • urban planning
  • sustainability
  • environmental impact
  • local economy
  • rejuvenation
  • construction
  • modernization
  • accessibility
  • demolition
  • gentrification
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