Some people think governments should spend money on the arts, while others believe it should be spent on public services. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that
governments
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should invest money in the
arts
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,
while
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others believe that public
services
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deserve more financial support.
Although
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both views have valid points, I believe that
governments
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should
prioritize
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prioritise
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public
services
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while
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still providing some funding for the
arts
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. On the one hand, spending money on the
arts
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can bring many benefits to society. Art, music, theatre, and cultural events help preserve national identity and make life more enjoyable for citizens.
In addition
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, investing in cultural projects can attract tourists from other countries.
For example
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, when
governments
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support museums, festivals, or historical buildings, more tourists may visit the country, which increases income for the economy.
As a result
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, funding the
arts
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can indirectly create jobs and promote cultural development.
On the other hand
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, many people think that public
services
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such
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as healthcare, education, and transportation should receive more government funding. These
services
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directly affect the quality of life of citizens.
For instance
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, well-funded hospitals can provide better medical care, and improved schools can give students better educational opportunities.
Furthermore
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, efficient public transport systems reduce traffic problems and make everyday life more convenient.
Therefore
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, investing in public
services
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is essential for the stability and well-being of society. In my opinion,
although
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the
arts
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are important for cultural enrichment,
governments
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should give priority to public
services
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because they meet the basic needs of the population.
However
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,
this
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does not mean that the
arts
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should be ignored. A balanced approach, where public
services
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receive the majority of funding and the
arts
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receive reasonable support, would be the most effective solution. In conclusion,
while
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government investment in the
arts
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can strengthen culture and tourism, public
services
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play a more crucial role in improving people’s daily lives.
For
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this
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reason,
governments
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should mainly focus on funding public
services
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while
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still supporting artistic development.

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task response
Add one more clear example for each side to make your ideas stronger.
task response
Explain your opinion a little more in the third paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Use more linking words like however, for example, and as a result with care.
coherence and cohesion
Some points are clear, but a few could be developed more fully.
task response
You answered both views and gave your opinion clearly.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph has one main idea, which is easy to follow.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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