IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The diagram shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane

The diagram shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane
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The diagram below depicts the procedure of creating
sugar
Use synonyms
 out of
sugar
Use synonyms
 cane. As can be seen, the process of transforming
sugar
Use synonyms
 cane into the final production of edible
sugar
Use synonyms
 contains several steps. First of all, we have to implant
sugar
Use synonyms
 canes and wait for their growth for a year or 3 months more maximum. Following that, the canes should be harvested either by complex and modern trucks or in the traditional way and by hand. The next step will be crushing them in order to extract a juice that will be purified using a special filter.
Then
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, the aforementioned juice will be converted to syrup via an evaporator.
After
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this
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 stage is complete, a centrifuge will divide the
sugar
Use synonyms
 from other elements of the syrup. Eventually, the wet production is to be dried and cooled in order to become final.
To sum up
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, in order to transform
sugar
Use synonyms
 cane into
sugar
Use synonyms
 we need to take several steps and It is a complex process.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words sugar with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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