In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

#countries #people #leisure #time #pressure #work #studies

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Some young people find themselves with very little leisure time. I believe there are two main causes of

this

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situation. The first is parental

pressure

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and the second is competition for

university

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places

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. Every parent wants to see his or her child do well in school and go on to have a successful career.

This

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means that they exert

pressure

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on their

children

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to spend hours each day studying at home. Some even arrange extra tuition for their

children

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. In my own country, it is not uncommon for young people to spend another three hours at small private schools after their usual day at

stale

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a stale

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school is over.

As a consequence

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, their leisure time is extremely limited and the

pressure

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on them is considerable. The second cause is related to the higher education system. Each year, there are many times more applicants to

university

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than there are

university

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places

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. The result of

this

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is that only those students with very high grades manage to obtain a place.

This

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contributes to the

pressure

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on teenagers since they must work long hours to have any chance of success. One solution to the problem is for parents to be made aware of the effects of the

pressure

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they put on their

children

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. Schools should inform parents that too much

pressure

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can lead to anxiety, stress and depression. They should be shown ways in which they can help their

children

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lead more balanced lives with a reasonable amount of leisure time. Another effective measure would be for the government to invest in the creation of more

university

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places

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This

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could be done by expanding existing universities or by building new ones.

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would have the effect of easing competition for

places

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giving teenagers some of their precious free lime back.

Submitted by dnm.best on Tue Sep 19 2023

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content

Address the full prompt: ensure you develop both causes and solutions evenly in your essay.

development

Incorporate more detailed, specific examples to support your points, which can lend more weight to your arguments and increase your score.

organization

Efficiently organize your paragraphs, ensuring clear and logical transitions between ideas, to maintain strong coherence throughout the response.

language

Use a varied range of structures and vocabulary to demonstrate language proficiency more effectively.

introduction/conclusion

Ensure that both the introduction and conclusion are clear, concise, and effectively summarize the main points of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

high expectations
academic success
future success
competitive nature
modern education systems
top grades
prestigious universities
high-paying jobs
rise of technology
social media platforms
physical activities
relaxation
extracurricular demands
multiple responsibilities
economic factors
lower-income families
part-time jobs
academic pressures

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In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Fully explain your ideas

Schools should use films, computers and games instead of books. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some governments provide financial assistance for retired, unemployed and disabled citizens. In other countries, families provide support for these people. Discuss both systems and give your opinion about which one you think is better.

Band 6+: At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

International tourism is now more common than ever before. Some feel that this is a positive trend, while others do not. what are your opinion on this?

People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns?