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Band 4

People should choose their course of study not on the basis of their own interests, but based on the kinds of jobs they can get. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #course #study #basis #interests #kinds #jobs
It
is argue
Change the verb form
is argued
show examples
 that whether
people
 should learn their favourite
subjects
 or
study
 for
course
Add an article
the course
show examples
 of knowledge that they can use in
future
Add an article
the future
show examples
 profession. In my point of view ,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 partly agree with the opinion and here are some reasons to back it up. On the one hand , the reason for
this
 is
gain
Change the verb form
to gain
gaining
show examples
 knowledge from
specific
Add an article
the specific
a specific
show examples
 course that
related
Add a missing verb
is related
show examples
 to your future
job
 which help
people
 know more about it and prepare themselves with all the
nescessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
 information when they graduate. As they
learning
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
 they can
also
 start working
part- time
Correct your spelling
part-time
show examples
 in
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
 in that field with the aim
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 more experience.
Moreover
,
people
 who
study
subjects
 that can be used in their future
job
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
have a specific destination and what they should learn and do
while
 those who
study
 the
subjects
 that help them pursue their
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
 might not have a clear goal.
On the other hand
, there are
also
 a lot of
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 why
study
Replace the word
studying
show examples
subjects
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their own interest is necessary. If students did not
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 the interesting part
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the course, they would
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 it boring and reluctant to continue to
study
 which eventually
lead
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 to a lack of knowledge in that field.
This
 could
also
 affect their academic results . More and more
people
pursue
Wrong verb form
pursuing
show examples
 their dream could create a new, popular profession that
solve
Change the verb form
solves
show examples
 both unemployment and the diversity of
job
Correct article usage
the job
show examples
 market. In conclusion,
although
people
 should a profession that
suit
Change the verb form
suits
show examples
 their desire, it is
also
 important to pay attention to
job
Add an article
the job
show examples
 market.
Submitted by doibichhoa on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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