IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

some people think healthcare should be free for everyone others think that people should pay for their medical costs themselves discuss both view and give your opinion.

#people #healthcare #costs
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
According to
Linking Words
 many individuals,
healthcare
Use synonyms
 is obligated to be free,
while
Linking Words
 others consider that they should pay on their own. Both plots will be projected followed by my opinion. Many of us
are believing
Wrong verb form
believe
show examples
 that medical charges should not be taken for the following reasons : One of the most significant aspects is that everyone cannot pay the cost of
healthcare
Use synonyms
 services, as they come from poorer backgrounds,
as
Change preposition
for
show examples
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example, those who are not able to fulfil at least their food scarcity, obviously cannot get
curement
Correct your spelling
cement
current
 at
this
Linking Words
 handsome amount which results into unawareness from all remedies that can cure them which is why ministry should pay for their therapy quality which
further
Linking Words
 leads to provide more and more work for the home, will definitely boost the economy of the nation as a whole. Others acknowledge that they are responsible for their treatment because some of those are extremely high cost, Government is not responsible for some that, including plastic surgery,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is not necessary to get but they desire to have, which accelerates their responsibility.
This
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
 unfolds their non-valueable behaviour, having no importance in their life, to exemplify, free
healthcare
Use synonyms
 leads to carelessness for their well-being. In my opinion, in the case of
healthcare
Use synonyms
 services, it should be categorised by poorer background and treatment as well. If those services are mandatory and highlight serious illness
then
Linking Words
 they should be non-chargeable for those who are not rich,
Linking Words
otherwise
Add a comma
,otherwise
show examples
 unnecessary treatment should be chargeable, giving rise to having value for the Government's service.
Submitted by Gopi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: