Air pollution is the most important concern of many countries. What are the main causes and effects of this issue?

One of the main problems of the earth is
air
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pollution
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nowadays.
This
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essay will show the main causes of polluted
air
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including vehicles which are increasing day by day and deforestation, and
also
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show some effects like some diseases
people
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suffer from and global warming. To see the news related to
air
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pollution
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frequently on TV has become usual for us. There are some reasons for
this
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problem. First of all, the majority of
people
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prefer to buy their own cars
instead
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of using public transport which causes an increase in the amount of carbon emission into the
air
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.
Secondly
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, trees the main reason for striking the balance between carbon dioxide and oxygen in the environment are cut down by humans which results from deforestation.
For example
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, trees supply
people
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with wood that are very important material in order to produce furniture, paper, and so on.
Therefore
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,
people
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cut down trees and
this
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destroys the balance
that is
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caused by
air
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pollution
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.
Air
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pollution
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has undeniable effects on
people
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and the environment.
Due to
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the poisonous gasses, the level of heating on the earth increases which brings about global warming.
Additionally
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, these gasses lead to some dangerous diseases
people
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such
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as lung cancer, stroke, and so on.
For instance
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, Antarctica is losing ice mass at an average of about 150 billion tons per year.
Thus
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,
air
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pollution
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is a cause of other crucial problems in the environment too.
To conclude
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,
air
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pollution
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is the main concern of the world. Deforestation and an increase in the number of vehicles lead to
this
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problem,
therefore
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,
people
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suffer from illnesses and global warming.

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task achievement
The introduction provides a clear overview of the topic but could be more engaging. Instead of saying 'this essay will show,' consider rephrasing it to indicate what the reader can expect more dynamically.
task achievement
Consider expanding on the impacts of air pollution with more specific examples and evidence to strengthen the argument. This would enhance your persuasive power.
coherence and cohesion
The essay could benefit from better transitions between ideas and paragraphs to improve its flow. For instance, indicating how the causes lead directly to certain effects can enhance coherence.
coherence and cohesion
It would be helpful to revisit the connections between deforestation and air pollution in your second body paragraph, making it clearer how these two issues are related.
task achievement
You have successfully identified clear causes and effects of air pollution, which is a key requirement for this essay type.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points, effectively reinforcing your argument about the significance of air pollution.
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