In many countries, imprisonment is the most common solution to crime. However, some people believe that better education will be effective solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #imprisonment #crime #people #education

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There is no denying the fact that life has a lot of surprises, whether it is acceptable or not.

While

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it is a commonly held belief that accepting sad situations is the best way, there is

also

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an argument that trying and improving are better methods. The essay will analyse

this

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topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On the one hand, satisfaction plays a crucial role in an individual's mental health.

In other words

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, accepting our situation can lead us to produce more than enough, so we have to stop blaming ourselves.

In addition

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, satisfaction is the trait of happiness that can reflect on our treatment of people.

For example

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, I have known a colleague who is not satisfied with his job because he was not promoted,

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nevertheless

Add a comma

nevertheless,

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he was a very happy and hard worker because he accepted his situation and enjoyed it.

On the other hand

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, improving and developing our skills are an important part of life. It is

also

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possible to say that desiring to get certificates and working hard to achieve goals is the best way to get plenty of opportunities and choices.

Moreover

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this

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concept will encourage people to get out of circle poverty.

For instance

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, I had a lack of experience and knowledge, so I decided to study in South Korea to improve my skills which helped me to get the job that I wanted when I was a child. In conclusion, there are no answers to

this

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question. On balance,

however

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, I tend to believe that encouraging ourselves to be better is a fantastic method.

Therefore

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, we should seek to acquire good skills to develop our levels and be good positive members of society

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task response

Ensure that the essay is directly addressing the prompt and fully developing the argument.

coherence and cohesion

The introduction and conclusion need to be clearer and more directly related to the topic. Work on smoother transition between ideas.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

285 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Recidivism
Rehabilitation
Deterrent
Vulnerable groups
Social inclusion
Crime prevention
Penal system
Reoffending rates
Restorative justice
Societal norms
Economic disparity
Educational disparity
Delinquency
Socioeconomic factors
Correlation vs causation

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A group of people think that the penalty for each kind of crime needs to equal, another group says that before giving punishment wants to analyse the stimulantt and motivation of the crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There are common beliefs such as every punishment for breaking low has to be the same, while others think that judgement systems should consider initiatives that force the convicts to do a particular crime. In my opinion, before judging someone for his or her wrong acts we must put ourselves in their spot and carefully make our perspective about the situation.

In many countries, imprisonment is the most common solution to crime. However, some people believe that better education will be effective solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Task 2: In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

Some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy, with everything organised and in the correct place. What is your opinion about this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Traffic abd housing problems in major cities could be solved by moving large companies and factories andtheir employees to the country side. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantanges outweigh the disadvamtages?

A group of people think that the penalty for each kind of crime needs to equal, another group says that before giving punishment wants to analyse the stimulantt and motivation of the crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.