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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car bus or train between 1970 and 2000

the graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car bus or train between 1970 and 2000
#uk #commuters #car #bus #train
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The supplied line graph depicts data about assorted transport
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
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utilized for going to work by people from 1970 to 2020 in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
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. Seen together, the most significant facts to emerge from the graph are that
car
Use synonyms
 was most popular for
using
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use
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 among individuals, and
train
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 increased slightly
whereas
Linking Words
bus
Use synonyms
 stayed at the same level during the full period. Looking at the information in more
details
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detail
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, 1970 showed
Use synonyms
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
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 stood at the highest with a mere 9
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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commuters
while
Linking Words
 4
million
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 people, who used
Bus
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,
Use synonyms
train
Add an article
the train
a train
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 was used by 2million people.
Car
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 soared marginally to 6
million
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 commuters in 1995,
withnotstanding
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withstanding
this
Linking Words
 figure staying
same
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the same
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 level,
car
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 climaxed at the highest point with 9million individuals. Focusing on
Use synonyms
bus
Wrong verb form
the buses
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,
always
Rephrase
apply
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this
Linking Words
 transport system
unchanged
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is unchanged
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 remaining 6million
of
Change preposition
apply
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passenger
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passengers
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however
Linking Words
Use synonyms
bus
Wrong verb form
the buses
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 witnessed
decline
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a decline
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 to just under
3million
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3 million
passenger
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passengers
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 at the final of
period
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the period
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.
Regard
Wrong verb form
Regarding
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 as
Train
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,
despite
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apply
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which was
third
Correct article usage
the third
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 popular transport system, between 1980 and 1990
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train
Correct article usage
the train
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 rose
a
Correct article usage
apply
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remarkably roughly to 3
million
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 users,
besides
Linking Words
 there were
4million
Correct your spelling
4 million
 commuters on the
train
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 in 1995,
lastly
Linking Words
Use synonyms
train
Correct article usage
the train
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 culminated to
whopping
Correct article usage
a whopping
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 5
million
Use synonyms
 passengers in the UK in 2000.
Submitted by @ur_davrik on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words car, train, bus, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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