Today it is common practice for many business meetings and business training to take place online. Do the advantages of this new development outweigh the disadvantages?
Nowadays,
people
who have own businesses prefer to spend meetings
and business training online. I am completely convinced that the advantages of this
outweigh its disadvantages. The main benefit of this
is a comfortable place and the main drawback is that they will have a sedentary lifestyle One of the principal advantages of comfortable
place is that Correct article usage
a comfortable
people
can allow themselves what they want. Therefore
, they have an
access Remove the article
apply
for
Change preposition
to
Internet
which plays a key role in online Add an article
the Internet
meetings
. For instance
, if people
spend more time on online meetings
, they might improve their job progress. As a result
, it can lead to a significant increase in career progression. Recent research found that over half of businessmen who met in business trainings
online became more productive and Change the wording
training
pieces of training
quality
of their work increased rapidly. One of the main disadvantages is that Correct article usage
the quality
people
might have sedentary
lifestyle because they will Add an article
a sedentary
spent
more time online, Change the verb form
spend
therefore
they might not have ambition
to go outside and have a bit of peace and quiet Change the article
the ambition
due to
the fact that they will be interested on
online Change the preposition
in
meetings
that real
. A primary example of Add a missing verb
are real
this
Add a missing verb
is businessmens
businessmens
from the USA who Correct your spelling
businessmen
businessman
believed
that online Wrong verb form
believe
meetings
better
than Add a missing verb
are better
real
. Correct pronoun usage
real ones
As a result
, it leaded
to problems with mental health , Correct your spelling
led
therefore
they reduced their sight and after
Correct word choice
apply
they
lost their businesses and became poor. In conclusion, Correct pronoun usage
apply
sedentary
life might lead to serious problems with Correct article usage
a sedentary
well- being
and whole life. Correct your spelling
well-being
However
, if people
want to achieve success with the help from
online Change preposition
of
meetings
a comfortable place and life will be better than sedentary
lifestyle.Add an article
a sedentary
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite