There is no need to attend a live performance (a play or concert) because seeing it at home on television is better. To what extend to you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
With the advancement of technology, it is much easier nowadays to watch live shows
While
sitting at
home
.
However
, there are a lot of
people
who believe that listening to a live concert has much more energy than listening at
home
.but, as far as I am concerned, I believe that watching
life
Replace the word
live
show examples
shows is much better than watching it on a television. To commence with the first notion, as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology is evolving, it is very convenient for
consumer
Add an article
the consumer
a consumer
show examples
to watch different sports or
concert
Fix the agreement mistake
concerts
show examples
on their devices. To elaborate, a person can watch the shows with
thier
Correct your spelling
their
family members and friends
while
staying at
home
and does not have difficulty travelling.
Moreover
, there are different platforms on
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
that
provides
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
live programs at a very reasonable price so that the consumer can buy their subscription.
For instance
, JioCinema provides different types of free LIVE concert or play on the app.
As a result
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humans will prefer to stay at
home
than to attend a live performance. On the paradoxical side, the
people
who do not visit the
stadium
cannot feel the vibe and the environment around the
stadium
. To simplify, there are a lot of
people
who come into the
stadium
to support their favourite singer or
sports persons
Correct your spelling
sportsperson
show examples
.
Further
Rephrase
Furthermore
show examples
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
they create
such
a
Change the article
an
show examples
environment that it gives goosebumps to both the player and the crowd.
For example
, around one lakh
people
have witnessed India versus Pakistan at Ahmedabad for a cricket
match
Add a comma
,match
show examples
you do the excitement and the madness for cricket.
In addition
to
this
, attending live plays or a match can
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
create a plethora of
employments
Fix the agreement mistake
employment
show examples
.
Thus
, there is a different feeling altogether to watch different shows and concerts live.
To conclude
, there are both positive and negative sides to the topic. But in my opinion, I totally disagree with the fact that
people
should watch on television
instead
Citizens can witness the LIVE crowd and the singers/players in the
stadium
because they have a much more positive side than sitting at
home
and watching alone.
Submitted by ayush.s2352 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: