There is no need to attend a live performance (a play or concert) because seeing it at home on television is better. To what extend to you agree or disagree?

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With the advancement of technology, it is much easier nowadays to watch live shows

While

Linking Words

sitting at

home

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, there are a lot of

people

Use synonyms

who believe that listening to a live concert has much more energy than listening at

home

Use synonyms

.but, as far as I am concerned, I believe that watching

life

Replace the word

live

show examples

shows is much better than watching it on a television. To commence with the first notion, as

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technology is evolving, it is very convenient for

consumer

Add an article

the consumer

a consumer

show examples

to watch different sports or

concert

Fix the agreement mistake

concerts

show examples

on their devices. To elaborate, a person can watch the shows with

thier

Correct your spelling

their

family members and friends

while

Linking Words

staying at

home

Use synonyms

and does not have difficulty travelling.

Moreover

Linking Words

, there are different platforms on

Internet

Add an article

the Internet

show examples

that

provides

Change the verb form

provide

show examples

live programs at a very reasonable price so that the consumer can buy their subscription.

For instance

Linking Words

, JioCinema provides different types of free LIVE concert or play on the app.

As a result

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

humans will prefer to stay at

home

Use synonyms

than to attend a live performance. On the paradoxical side, the

people

Use synonyms

who do not visit the

stadium

Use synonyms

cannot feel the vibe and the environment around the

stadium

Use synonyms

. To simplify, there are a lot of

people

Use synonyms

who come into the

stadium

Use synonyms

to support their favourite singer or

sports persons

Correct your spelling

sportsperson

show examples

Linking Words

Further

Rephrase

Furthermore

show examples

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

they create

such

Linking Words

Change the article

show examples

environment that it gives goosebumps to both the player and the crowd.

For example

Linking Words

, around one lakh

people

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have witnessed India versus Pakistan at Ahmedabad for a cricket

match

Add a comma

,match

show examples

you do the excitement and the madness for cricket.

In addition

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, attending live plays or a match can

you

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

create a plethora of

employments

Fix the agreement mistake

employment

show examples

Thus

Linking Words

, there is a different feeling altogether to watch different shows and concerts live.

To conclude

Linking Words

, there are both positive and negative sides to the topic. But in my opinion, I totally disagree with the fact that

people

Use synonyms

should watch on television

instead

Linking Words

Citizens can witness the LIVE crowd and the singers/players in the

stadium

Use synonyms

because they have a much more positive side than sitting at

home

Use synonyms

and watching alone.

ayush.s2352Thu Sep 28 2023

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

342 words

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There is no need to attend a live performance (a play or concert) because seeing it at home on television is better. To what extend to you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

A 'cashless society' is one where people use debit/credit cards and other forms of payment instead of cash. Do the advantages of a cashless society outweigh the disadvantages?

Pollution of rivers, lakes and seas is a major concern for people who seek to protect the environment. What are the possible causes of water pollution, and what effects does this have on animal life and human society?

The government should control the Internet to reduce cyber crime and ensure safety of users. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?