Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#scientists #people #junk #food #health #education #work

this

day and age, research proves that the amount of fast

food

consumed is out of control,

moreover

, it can cause unhealthy situations and even diseases. When it comes to the solutions to

this

issue, there are two contrasting opinions, one supposes

that is

able to

dealt

Add a missing verb

be dealt

show examples

with by education,

whereas

another disagrees with the effects of educating

people

. The essay will discuss both sides and explain why I agree with the latter idea. On the one hand, improving

people

's awareness of detrimental substances contained in fast

food

seems to be the most possible way to keep them away from that harmful diet.

This

is because many individuals do not realize how acute dishes like burgers and chips can attack them. The case of some developing countries where human health is not taken seriously is an example. Citizens there only concentrate on the convenience that junk

food

service brings about, not its long-term consequences.

Therefore

people

would consider carefully about their eating habits if they were educated.

On the other hand

, it can be said that education usually has no use. Nowadays, consumers are able to access information simply, so they may all know the junk

food

's terrible effects.

However

, perhaps they do not care much about them. A piece of evidence that can be offered is Coke, one of the most popular soft drink brands in the world. Despite the fact that everyone knows it includes high levels of added sugar and processed preservatives, which leads to health problems

such

as obesity, diabetes and so on, nobody has

Change the article

the

show examples

intention to modify the habit of drinking it regularly.

Moreover

, the apathetic attitude of individuals is

also

recognized via the rapidly increasing sales and the constant appearance of fast

food

restaurants like McDonald's or KFC

Change preposition

show examples

every corner from urban to rural areas. To summarize,

although

educating

people

has certain impacts on coping with

this

issue, its scale is extremely small and insignificant.

Hence

, I personally believe education has never been a good solution to resolve the problem of fast-

food

consumption.

Thu May 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

To enhance your essay's coherence and cohesion, you can work on making smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs. This will help guide the reader through your argument more effectively.

task achievement

For a better task achievement score, make sure to delve deeper into your examples and elaborate more on how education could influence junk food consumption. Providing more comprehensive and specific details can strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

You provided an effective introduction and conclusion, framing your argument well.

coherence cohesion

The essay demonstrates a good logical structure that discusses both views before presenting your opinion.

task achievement

You provided specific examples to support your points, such as the case of Coke and the prevalence of fast food restaurants.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

342 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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In most successful companies, some people think that communication between employers and workers is the most important factor. Other people say that other factors are more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Establishing good relationships in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement