In many countries, people are moving away from rural areas and towards urban areas. Why do you think that is? What problems can this cause?

Urbanization has happened in many nations regardless of their economic scale. From my perspective, the desire of individuals to access greater opportunities is the foremost reason behind
this
phenomenon.
This
essay will investigate the implicit reasons for
this
phenomenon and illustrate some salient adverse ramifications. In my opinion, urbanization has stemmed from individuals' aspirations including better living standards and more vacancy occupations.
Firstly
, the initial dream is to possess better standards when they can access better facilities,
such
as modern hospitals, attractive entertainment houses and renowned educational institutions. In
further
explanation, the infrastructure in the metropolis is usually invested more than that in rural areas,
while
the architectural style in these residential zones is in harmony with more greenery spaces and communal grounds.
For instance
, the youngster could find their desirable educational institutions, which were constructed with better research facilities and larger areas.
Secondly
, the majority of people relocate to find employment with higher salaries and some ever welfare before. In general, they possibly have brighter future prospects in a hustling city, so they have more
job
opportunities to choose from the
job
market and more space to express their skills.
Furthermore
, they could study more skills and accumulate their experience, before climbing the higher career ladder.
As a result
, they could receive financial returns, colleagues and shareholder recognition, which are a cornerstone of their material and mental lives.
However
, urbanization has led to a higher density of the demographic, which results in many problems.
Initially
,
this
population extent leads to the inflation of prices of a wide range of commodities when the human demand is higher than their supply capacities.
In particular
,
this
contributed to increasing basic production prices and the real estate shortage in many metropolises, which has made humans living in slums with poor living conditions.
For instance
, a journal report in VietNam recently indicated that over 5 people suffocated in a fire owing to the degraded electric system and the density of workers in a small shabby house. In general,
this
massive immigration has not brought better living conditions and has put many labourers into sweatshops.
Due to
the labour resources being higher than the market demand, these people have competed with individuals with higher competition and lower salaries.
For example
, these citizens usually work overtime with no overtime bonuses to meet their project deadlines and task due dates.
To conclude
, from my perspective, better living standards and more
job
opportunities are the main impetus for
this
migration. The higher population intensity has exacerbated some issues including poor living conditions and more
job
competition.
Submitted by lenam2k1 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While the essay effectively addresses the task, some sentences could be made more concise for clarity. Avoid adding more complex ideas if not necessary.
coherence cohesion
Some ideas need clearer connection or smoother transition to enhance cohesiveness. For instance, explaining how moving to urban areas directly affects living conditions and job opportunities can help maintain a clear logical flow.
task achievement
The essay offers a complete and relevant response to the task, providing both reasons for urbanization and its subsequent problems.
coherence cohesion
A proper introduction and conclusion frame the essay, making the writing feel complete and purposeful.
coherence cohesion
Main points are generally well-developed and supported with relevant, specific examples.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: